Forums - Open Redstone Engineers

To save all the other threads from getting spammed constantly, i made this thread. Its 100% legal to post here just for your post count, to annoy other people, or to spell the alphabet in 24 different posts (Xeo and dc).

dis alloweded?

Yup.

I'm so tired ;_;

Let's, like, actually keep it in here. saveshenanigans2014

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sdfgaerdfg

fakdlfhl;aj

adfhasdjfkl;asdl;kgh

adjk;jkl;adf

asdfak/sdhgkl;a

asdk;fhal;dshf

asdgkhadoiho[sdflkjnasdo[g

adsfakl;sdfn

asdfmaskl;dgnkl;asdjgjasdfjasdkl;gnkl'

adfgadkl;sfkl;andgkl;

asdfjaldjfkl;ansdl;ndl;kgnakl;sdnkl;f

asdadkl;ngjkl;adngkl;

jkadfljadsgl;asdl;gnakl;sdg

asdipfgasdklgkl;asdjgkl;asdgn

asdfasdfasdfgea

adghal;sdjgkl;dngl;nadl;gnl;kadgnl;nal;kn

akdl;aj666al;dnl;knagl;sdf

dgasdfkl;

asdkh;djfkl;jasdfl ;-;

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asdfasdfag

sdlfjal;sdjklabsjkldgnj;asdngkl;jsda

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asdlgnl;kdsngkl;asdgnkl;adnsgkl;asg

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AHHAHAHHAHAHAH yes 1800 post! i would like to thank evil for making this thread!

What does post count benefit?

50 pages later...

(03-04-2014, 07:50 PM)Nuuppanaani Wrote: [ -> ]What does post count benefit?

absolutly fucking nothing!

Well generally the post count is a good indicator of how active the user has been, and therefore, more experienced and reputable. However with threads like these I'm not so sure such a generalization can be made anymore...

newo killed it but its true lol

No. Never!

*Deleted thread within 2 days*









*or not*

Only 1 king will rise on the Ore forums!

Wait a min... this isn't the poetry thread.

I'm deaad

Time to bump this to actually save the shenanigans sub-forum.

yeah. you all bitching about bitching in the bitch forum killed it

(04-01-2014, 08:55 PM)EDevil Wrote: [ -> ]Time to bump this to actually save the shenanigans sub-forum.

Evil, you have just awoken the beast of shenanigans! We shall now all be punished for your thoughtless actions.

Nono, im SAVING shenanigans! By only posting pointless shit in this thread, we actually save the other threads in shenanigans!

I see your thinking.

Evil get back in side the box

YOU SHALL KNOW MY NAME

No -_-

(04-02-2014, 11:08 PM)Chibill Wrote: [ -> ]Evil get back in side the box

Okay ;_;

Nvm you put me in the box.

EVIL, YOU GUYS KEPT BITCHING ABOUT THE BITCH SUBFORUM AND KILLED IT

*uses a can opener to open dc's can O spam and pour it in to my post count.*

You need less aft in your life!

SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM

ajbgfvshyufnbsknjk

Is that what this tread is for?

yup.

GENIUS!

GAHALSASLKJAKF JOHN LEENNON!OJDAKHLA:KSDAKHDFH KAFJAKF IKIKK HAKSDA HEATE" AKSD
}}{{ }A{DDSLK A SDA@#@@@@@@@@@@@

---

Page 8 only??? WTF

(04-05-2014, 04:51 PM)greatgamer34 Wrote: [ -> ]GAHALSASLKJAKF JOHN LEENNON!OJDAKHLA:KSDAKHDFH KAFJAKF IKIKK HAKSDA HEATE" AKSD
}}{{ }A{DDSLK A SDA@#@@@@@@@@@@@

---

Page 8 only??? WTF

Which about 6 of them are posts only from dc.

I never got into spamming, it's just too mainstream.

It will be old by the time the FTB server gets up.

mmmmm

hahahahaha

Who the hell are you?

(04-06-2014, 06:06 PM)Xeomorpher Wrote: [ -> ]

(04-06-2014, 05:57 PM)EDevil Wrote: [ -> ]

(04-06-2014, 03:52 PM)seankingman Wrote: [ -> ]Who the hell are you?

Are you guys trying to make a huge pyramid of quotes?

(04-06-2014, 07:27 PM)Nuuppanaani Wrote: [ -> ]

(04-06-2014, 06:06 PM)Xeomorpher Wrote: [ -> ]

(04-06-2014, 05:57 PM)EDevil Wrote: [ -> ]

(04-06-2014, 03:52 PM)seankingman Wrote: [ -> ]Who the hell are you?

Are you guys trying to make a huge pyramid of quotes?

YESSSS

(04-06-2014, 08:18 PM)AFtExploision Wrote: [ -> ]

(04-06-2014, 07:27 PM)Nuuppanaani Wrote: [ -> ]

(04-06-2014, 06:06 PM)Xeomorpher Wrote: [ -> ]

(04-06-2014, 05:57 PM)EDevil Wrote: [ -> ]

(04-06-2014, 03:52 PM)seankingman Wrote: [ -> ]Who the hell are you?

Are you guys trying to make a huge pyramid of quotes?

YESSSS

And I'm the centre of it!

I wasn't trying to do so...

And yet you succeeded.

(04-06-2014, 08:44 PM)seankingman Wrote: [ -> ]

(04-06-2014, 08:18 PM)AFtExploision Wrote: [ -> ]

(04-06-2014, 07:27 PM)Nuuppanaani Wrote: [ -> ]

(04-06-2014, 06:06 PM)Xeomorpher Wrote: [ -> ]

(04-06-2014, 05:57 PM)EDevil Wrote: [ -> ]

Are you guys trying to make a huge pyramid of quotes?

YESSSS

And I'm the centre of it!

HUXXA

Oh hey look it's my 899th post

Maybe I'll stop posting for a while just to rustle some of your OCDs. luv u

(04-06-2014, 08:59 PM)AFtExploision Wrote: [ -> ]

(04-06-2014, 08:44 PM)seankingman Wrote: [ -> ]

(04-06-2014, 08:18 PM)AFtExploision Wrote: [ -> ]

(04-06-2014, 07:27 PM)Nuuppanaani Wrote: [ -> ]

(04-06-2014, 06:06 PM)Xeomorpher Wrote: [ -> ]

Are you guys trying to make a huge pyramid of quotes?

YESSSS

And I'm the centre of it!

HUXXA

NOOOOOOOOO!

---

I'm at 444.

Lul fail.

(04-09-2014, 05:16 PM)Shophaune Wrote: [ -> ]Lul fail.

Who are you?

(04-09-2014, 05:50 PM)EDevil Wrote: [ -> ]

(04-09-2014, 05:16 PM)Shophaune Wrote: [ -> ]Lul fail.

Who are you?

That's what I was thinking...

(04-09-2014, 06:05 PM)seankingman Wrote: [ -> ]

(04-09-2014, 05:50 PM)EDevil Wrote: [ -> ]

(04-09-2014, 05:16 PM)Shophaune Wrote: [ -> ]Lul fail.

Who are you?

That's what I was thinking...

as was I.

This thread makes me sad.

(04-10-2014, 04:31 AM)newomaster Wrote: [ -> ]This thread makes me sad.

Be happy we don't do this in the applications subforum. Actually, let's do it!

(04-11-2014, 06:39 AM)David Wrote: [ -> ]

(04-10-2014, 04:31 AM)newomaster Wrote: [ -> ]This thread makes me sad.

Be happy we don't do this in the applications subforum. Actually, let's do it!

reply chain

---

(04-12-2014, 11:55 PM)greatgamer34 Wrote: [ -> ]

(04-11-2014, 06:39 AM)David Wrote: [ -> ]

(04-10-2014, 04:31 AM)newomaster Wrote: [ -> ]This thread makes me sad.

Be happy we don't do this in the applications subforum. Actually, let's do it!

reply chain

reply chain again

The definition of spam is mildly interesting here.

I had so much fun with you guys in TS last night.

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=hMhSrSZ8qhY

Check the comments

---

Haha, poor kid.

It's tello's little brother. I hope he told him it was just a joke

I know. I was there. Would be funny to see the response.

Oh yeah, you just got there right when I started so I forgot.

I was there for a while, actually. Making that RAM and confused of who you were.

*gives Xray the SAT exam*

*gives Xray the ACT exam*

*trys to remember if xray took the PSAT*

I already took the PSAT, 48 on comp and 68 on math. I didn't prepare for it.

(04-17-2014, 06:39 PM)Xray_Doc Wrote: [ -> ]I already took the PSAT, 48 on comp and 68 on math. I didn't prepare for it.

Dayum.... From those scores, I am surprised you passed elementary school.

Like I said, I hadn't prepared for it. And I have a 3.8 unweighted GPA so I'm not an idiot.

(04-17-2014, 07:47 PM)Xray_Doc Wrote: [ -> ]Like I said, I hadn't prepared for it. And I have a 3.8 unweighted GPA so I'm not an idiot.

That may classify me as one though.

I can't remember how to make an XOR gate

0+0=0
0+1=1
1+0=1
1+1=0

Let THAT be your truth table.

ur mum is on my truth table

The only truth we need is one of compassion, wisdom and intellect.

Hi virt

Hi xray

hi me

No.

(04-18-2014, 07:51 PM)seankingman Wrote: [ -> ]No.

nes

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---

hehe... *its legal*

b&

Spam? I can Spam using the Spam from My Spam.

---

Spam ceaption.

I SPAM SPAM YOUR SPAMMING SPAM

Some how I think something is not right about this:

uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg I r spammers you happy mom? no? awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwisdhudfhiusdfhbbfrnbhfnhujdfghdkjfhksjhdfksjdfhsjkdhfskjdfhjksdhfkjshdfjksdhfkjsdhfkjshdfjksdhkfjsdhkfsjhdjfk______________________-----------------------___________________________________________________________________________________________fudge

/o\

i know ive been mean
but deep down inside me somplace
u will find that i appreciate u

(05-02-2014, 11:13 AM)Iceglade Wrote: [ -> ]i know ive been mean
but deep down inside me somplace
u will find that i appreciate u

at first that looked like a haiku...

here you go

I know I've been mean
but deep down inside someplace
you'll find that I care

Orbital Insertion;
thrust
thrust
thrust
reentry.

Someone wrote that in one of my books.. it's kinda a poem

The 3dx orbital can hold 2 elections.

24/7

24/7!

24/7!!

24/7!!!

Okay I'll stop now.

#rekt

One baby to another says -
I'm lucky to have met you
I don't care what you think
Unless it is about me
It is now my duty to completely drain you
A travel through a tube
And end up in your infection

Chew your meat for you
Pass it back and forth
In a passionate kiss
From my mouth to yours
I like you

With eyes so dialated,
I've become your pupil
You've taught me everything
Without a poison apple
The water is so yellow, I'm a healthy student
Indebted and so grateful -
Vacuum out the fluids

Chew your meat for you
Pass it back and forth
In a passionate kiss
From my mouth to yours
I like you
One baby to another says -
I'm lucky to have met you
I don't care what you think
Unless it is about me
It is now my duty to completely drain you
A travel through a tube
And end up in your infection

Chew your meat for you
Pass it back and forth
In a passionate kiss
From my mouth to yours
I like you

With eyes so dialated,
I've become your pupil
You've taught me everything
Without a poison apple
The water is so yellow, I'm a healthy student
Indebted and so grateful -
Vacuum out the fluids

Chew your meat for you
Pass it back and forth
In a passionate kiss
From my mouth to yours
I like you
One baby to another says -
I'm lucky to have met you
I don't care what you think
Unless it is about me
It is now my duty to completely drain you
A travel through a tube
And end up in your infection

Chew your meat for you
Pass it back and forth
In a passionate kiss
From my mouth to yours
I like you

With eyes so dialated,
I've become your pupil
You've taught me everything
Without a poison apple
The water is so yellow, I'm a healthy student
Indebted and so grateful -
Vacuum out the fluids

Chew your meat for you
Pass it back and forth
In a passionate kiss
From my mouth to yours
I like you
One baby to another says -
I'm lucky to have met you
I don't care what you think
Unless it is about me
It is now my duty to completely drain you
A travel through a tube
And end up in your infection

Chew your meat for you
Pass it back and forth
In a passionate kiss
From my mouth to yours
I like you

With eyes so dialated,
I've become your pupil
You've taught me everything
Without a poison apple
The water is so yellow, I'm a healthy student
Indebted and so grateful -
Vacuum out the fluids

Chew your meat for you
Pass it back and forth
In a passionate kiss
From my mouth to yours
I like you

Teenage angst has paid off well
Now I'm bored and old
Self-appointed judges judge
More than they have sold

If she floats than she is not
A witch like we had thought
A down payment on another
One at salem's lot

Serve the servants - Oh no [x4]

That legendary divorce is such a bore

As my bones grew they did hurt
They hurt really bad
I tried hard to have a father
But instead I had a dad

I just want you to know that I
Don't hate you anymore
There is nothing I could say
That I haven't thought before

Serve the servants - Oh no [x4]

That legendary divorce is such a bore

Serve the servants - Oh no [x7]

That legendary divorce is such a bore

Teenage angst has paid off well
Now I'm bored and old
Self-appointed judges judge
More than they have sold

If she floats than she is not
A witch like we had thought
A down payment on another
One at salem's lot

Serve the servants - Oh no [x4]

That legendary divorce is such a bore

As my bones grew they did hurt
They hurt really bad
I tried hard to have a father
But instead I had a dad

I just want you to know that I
Don't hate you anymore
There is nothing I could say
That I haven't thought before

Serve the servants - Oh no [x4]

That legendary divorce is such a bore

Serve the servants - Oh no [x7]

That legendary divorce is such a bore

Teenage angst has paid off well
Now I'm bored and old
Self-appointed judges judge
More than they have sold

If she floats than she is not
A witch like we had thought
A down payment on another
One at salem's lot

Serve the servants - Oh no [x4]

That legendary divorce is such a bore

As my bones grew they did hurt
They hurt really bad
I tried hard to have a father
But instead I had a dad

I just want you to know that I
Don't hate you anymore
There is nothing I could say
That I haven't thought before

Serve the servants - Oh no [x4]

That legendary divorce is such a bore

Serve the servants - Oh no [x7]

That legendary divorce is such a bore
Truth - covered in security
I can't let you smother me
I'd like to, but it couldn't work
Trading off and taking turns
I don't regret a thing
And I've got this friend, you see
Who makes me feel and I
Wanted more than I could steal
I'll arrest myself, I'll wear a shield
I'll go out of my way to prove I still
I still smell her on you

Don't - tell me what I wanna hear
Afraid of never knowing fear
Experience anything you need
I'll keep fighting jealousy
Until it's fucking gone

And I've got this friend, you see
Who makes me feel and I
Wanted more than I could steal
I'll arrest myself, I'll wear a shield
I'll go out of my way to prove I still
I still smell her on you

Truth! - covered in security
I can't let you smother me
I'd like to but it couldn't work
Trading off and taking turns
I don't regret a thing
And I've got this friend, you see
Who makes me feel and I
Wanted more than I could steal
I'll arrest myself, I'll wear a shield
I'll go out of my way to make you a deal
We've made a pact to learn from who
Ever we want without new rules
We'll share what's lost and what we grew
They'll go out of their way
To prove they still

Still smell her on you [x3]
oad up on guns, bring your friends
It's fun to lose and to pretend
She's over bored and self assured
Oh no, I know a dirty word

Hello, hello, hello, how low? [x3]
Hello, hello, hello!

With the lights out, it's less dangerous
Here we are now, entertain us
I feel stupid and contagious
Here we are now, entertain us
A mulatto
An albino
A mosquito
My libido
Yay! [x3]

I'm worse at what I do best
And for this gift I feel blessed
Our little group has always been
And always will until the end

Hello, hello, hello, how low? [x3]
Hello, hello, hello!

With the lights out, it's less dangerous
Here we are now, entertain us
I feel stupid and contagious
Here we are now, entertain us
A mulatto
An albino
A mosquito
My libido
Yay! [x3]

And I forget just why I taste
Oh yeah, I guess it makes me smile
I found it hard, it's hard to find
Oh well, whatever, never mind

Hello, hello, hello, how low? [x3]
Hello, hello, hello!

With the lights out, it's less dangerous
Here we are now, entertain us
I feel stupid and contagious
Here we are now, entertain us
A mulatto
An albino
A mosquito
My libido
oad up on guns, bring your friends
It's fun to lose and to pretend
She's over bored and self assured
Oh no, I know a dirty word

Hello, hello, hello, how low? [x3]
Hello, hello, hello!

With the lights out, it's less dangerous
Here we are now, entertain us
I feel stupid and contagious
Here we are now, entertain us
A mulatto
An albino
A mosquito
My libido
Yay! [x3]

I'm worse at what I do best
And for this gift I feel blessed
Our little group has always been
And always will until the end

Hello, hello, hello, how low? [x3]
Hello, hello, hello!

With the lights out, it's less dangerous
Here we are now, entertain us
I feel stupid and contagious
Here we are now, entertain us
A mulatto
An albino
A mosquito
My libido
Yay! [x3]

And I forget just why I taste
Oh yeah, I guess it makes me smile
I found it hard, it's hard to find
Oh well, whatever, never mind

Hello, hello, hello, how low? [x3]
Hello, hello, hello!

With the lights out, it's less dangerous
Here we are now, entertain us
I feel stupid and contagious
Here we are now, entertain us
A mulatto
An albino
A mosquito
My libido
oad up on guns, bring your friends
It's fun to lose and to pretend
She's over bored and self assured
Oh no, I know a dirty word

Hello, hello, hello, how low? [x3]
Hello, hello, hello!

With the lights out, it's less dangerous
Here we are now, entertain us
I feel stupid and contagious
Here we are now, entertain us
A mulatto
An albino
A mosquito
My libido
Yay! [x3]

I'm worse at what I do best
And for this gift I feel blessed
Our little group has always been
And always will until the end

Hello, hello, hello, how low? [x3]
Hello, hello, hello!

With the lights out, it's less dangerous
Here we are now, entertain us
I feel stupid and contagious
Here we are now, entertain us
A mulatto
An albino
A mosquito
My libido
Yay! [x3]

And I forget just why I taste
Oh yeah, I guess it makes me smile
I found it hard, it's hard to find
Oh well, whatever, never mind

Hello, hello, hello, how low? [x3]
Hello, hello, hello!

With the lights out, it's less dangerous
Here we are now, entertain us
I feel stupid and contagious
Here we are now, entertain us
A mulatto
An albino
A mosquito
My libido
Use just once and destroy
Invasion of our piracy
Afterbirth of a nation
Starve without your skeleton key

I love you for what I am not
I do not want what I have got
A blanket acne'ed with ciggarette burns
Speak at once while taking turns

What is wrong with me [x3]

I'm gonna do with what you think
If you ever think at all
Bi-polar opposites attract
All of a sudden my water broke

I love you for what I am not
I do not want what I have got
A blanket acne'ed with ciggarette burns
Second-rate third degree burns

What is wrong with me [x2]
What do I think of me ?

Hate, hate your enemies
Save, save your friends
Find, find your place
Speak, speak the truth

What is wrong with me [x3]
What do I think of me ?

Use just once and destroy
Invasion of our piracy
Afterbirth of a nation
Starve without your skeleton key

[x2]
What is wrong with me [x3]
What do I think of me ?
Use just once and destroy
Invasion of our piracy
Afterbirth of a nation
Starve without your skeleton key

I love you for what I am not
I do not want what I have got
A blanket acne'ed with ciggarette burns
Speak at once while taking turns

What is wrong with me [x3]

I'm gonna do with what you think
If you ever think at all
Bi-polar opposites attract
All of a sudden my water broke

I love you for what I am not
I do not want what I have got
A blanket acne'ed with ciggarette burns
Second-rate third degree burns

What is wrong with me [x2]
What do I think of me ?

Hate, hate your enemies
Save, save your friends
Find, find your place
Speak, speak the truth

What is wrong with me [x3]
What do I think of me ?

Use just once and destroy
Invasion of our piracy
Afterbirth of a nation
Starve without your skeleton key

[x2]
What is wrong with me [x3]
What do I think of me ?
In linear algebra, a rotation matrix is a matrix that is used to perform a rotation in Euclidean space. For example the matrix

R =
\begin{bmatrix}
\cos \theta & -\sin \theta \\
\sin \theta & \cos \theta \\
\end{bmatrix}
rotates points in the xy-Cartesian plane counter-clockwise through an angle θ about the origin of the Cartesian coordinate system. To perform the rotation using a rotation matrix R, the position of each point must be represented by a column vector v, containing the coordinates of the point. A rotated vector is obtained by using the matrix multiplication Rv.

Rotation matrices also provide a means of numerically representing an arbitrary rotation of the axes about the origin, without appealing to angular specification. These coordinate rotations are a natural way to express the orientation of a camera, or the attitude of a spacecraft, relative to a reference axes-set. Once an observational platform's local X-Y-Z axes are expressed numerically as three direction vectors in world coordinates, they together comprise the columns of rotation matrix R (world --> platform) that transforms directions (expressed in world coordinates) into equivalent directions expressed in platform-local coordinates.

The examples in this article apply to rotation of vectors anti-clockwise in a right-handed system by pre-multiplication. If any one of these is changed (e.g. rotating axes instead of vectors), then the transpose of the example matrix should be used.

Since matrix multiplication has no effect on the zero vector (the coordinates of the origin), rotation matrices can only be used to describe rotations about the origin of the coordinate system. Rotation matrices provide an algebraic description of such rotations, and are used extensively for computations in geometry, physics, and computer graphics.

Rotation matrices are square matrices, with real entries. More specifically they can be characterized as orthogonal matrices with determinant 1:

R^{T} = R^{-1}, \det R = 1\,.
In some literature, the term rotation is generalized to include improper rotations, characterized by orthogonal matrices with determinant −1 (instead of +1). These combine proper rotations with reflections (which invert orientation). In other cases, where reflections are not being considered, the label proper may be dropped. This convention is followed in this article.

The set of all orthogonal matrices of size n with determinant +1 forms a group known as the special orthogonal group SO(n). The set of all orthogonal matrices of size n with determinant +1 or -1 forms the (general) orthogonal group O(n).
In linear algebra, a rotation matrix is a matrix that is used to perform a rotation in Euclidean space. For example the matrix

R =
\begin{bmatrix}
\cos \theta & -\sin \theta \\
\sin \theta & \cos \theta \\
\end{bmatrix}
rotates points in the xy-Cartesian plane counter-clockwise through an angle θ about the origin of the Cartesian coordinate system. To perform the rotation using a rotation matrix R, the position of each point must be represented by a column vector v, containing the coordinates of the point. A rotated vector is obtained by using the matrix multiplication Rv.

Rotation matrices also provide a means of numerically representing an arbitrary rotation of the axes about the origin, without appealing to angular specification. These coordinate rotations are a natural way to express the orientation of a camera, or the attitude of a spacecraft, relative to a reference axes-set. Once an observational platform's local X-Y-Z axes are expressed numerically as three direction vectors in world coordinates, they together comprise the columns of rotation matrix R (world --> platform) that transforms directions (expressed in world coordinates) into equivalent directions expressed in platform-local coordinates.

The examples in this article apply to rotation of vectors anti-clockwise in a right-handed system by pre-multiplication. If any one of these is changed (e.g. rotating axes instead of vectors), then the transpose of the example matrix should be used.

Since matrix multiplication has no effect on the zero vector (the coordinates of the origin), rotation matrices can only be used to describe rotations about the origin of the coordinate system. Rotation matrices provide an algebraic description of such rotations, and are used extensively for computations in geometry, physics, and computer graphics.

Rotation matrices are square matrices, with real entries. More specifically they can be characterized as orthogonal matrices with determinant 1:

R^{T} = R^{-1}, \det R = 1\,.
In some literature, the term rotation is generalized to include improper rotations, characterized by orthogonal matrices with determinant −1 (instead of +1). These combine proper rotations with reflections (which invert orientation). In other cases, where reflections are not being considered, the label proper may be dropped. This convention is followed in this article.

The set of all orthogonal matrices of size n with determinant +1 forms a group known as the special orthogonal group SO(n). The set of all orthogonal matrices of size n with determinant +1 or -1 forms the (general) orthogonal group O(n).
In linear algebra, a rotation matrix is a matrix that is used to perform a rotation in Euclidean space. For example the matrix

R =
\begin{bmatrix}
\cos \theta & -\sin \theta \\
\sin \theta & \cos \theta \\
\end{bmatrix}
rotates points in the xy-Cartesian plane counter-clockwise through an angle θ about the origin of the Cartesian coordinate system. To perform the rotation using a rotation matrix R, the position of each point must be represented by a column vector v, containing the coordinates of the point. A rotated vector is obtained by using the matrix multiplication Rv.

Rotation matrices also provide a means of numerically representing an arbitrary rotation of the axes about the origin, without appealing to angular specification. These coordinate rotations are a natural way to express the orientation of a camera, or the attitude of a spacecraft, relative to a reference axes-set. Once an observational platform's local X-Y-Z axes are expressed numerically as three direction vectors in world coordinates, they together comprise the columns of rotation matrix R (world --> platform) that transforms directions (expressed in world coordinates) into equivalent directions expressed in platform-local coordinates.

The examples in this article apply to rotation of vectors anti-clockwise in a right-handed system by pre-multiplication. If any one of these is changed (e.g. rotating axes instead of vectors), then the transpose of the example matrix should be used.

Since matrix multiplication has no effect on the zero vector (the coordinates of the origin), rotation matrices can only be used to describe rotations about the origin of the coordinate system. Rotation matrices provide an algebraic description of such rotations, and are used extensively for computations in geometry, physics, and computer graphics.

Rotation matrices are square matrices, with real entries. More specifically they can be characterized as orthogonal matrices with determinant 1:

R^{T} = R^{-1}, \det R = 1\,.
In some literature, the term rotation is generalized to include improper rotations, characterized by orthogonal matrices with determinant −1 (instead of +1). These combine proper rotations with reflections (which invert orientation). In other cases, where reflections are not being considered, the label proper may be dropped. This convention is followed in this article.

The set of all orthogonal matrices of size n with determinant +1 forms a group known as the special orthogonal group SO(n). The set of all orthogonal matrices of size n with determinant +1 or -1 forms the (general) orthogonal group O(n).
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In Euclidean geometry, a rotation is an example of an isometry, a transformation that moves points without changing the distances between them. Rotations are distinguished from other isometries by two additional properties: they leave (at least) one point fixed, and they leave "handedness" unchanged. By contrast, a translation moves every point, a reflection exchanges left- and right-handed ordering, and a glide reflection does both.

A rotation that does not leave "handedness" unchanged is an improper rotation or a rotoinversion.

If we take the fixed point as the origin of a Cartesian coordinate system, then every point can be given coordinates as a displacement from the origin. Thus we may work with the vector space of displacements instead of the points themselves. Now suppose (p1,…,pn) are the coordinates of the vector p from the origin, O, to point P. Choose an orthonormal basis for our coordinates; then the squared distance to P, by Pythagoras, is

She should have stayed away from friends
She should have had more time to spend
She should have died when she was born
She should have worn the crown of thorns

She should have - been a son
She should have - been a son
She should have - been a son
She should have - been a son

She should have stood out in the crowd
She should have made her mother proud
She should have fallen on her stance
She should have had another chance

[x2]
She should have - been a son
She should have - been a son
She should have - been a son
She should have - been a son

She should have stayed away from friends
She should have had more time to spend
She should have died when she was born
She should have worn the crown of thorns

She should have - been a son
She should have - been a son
She should have - been a son
She should have - been a son
She should have stayed away from friends
She should have had more time to spend
She should have died when she was born
She should have worn the crown of thorns

She should have - been a son
She should have - been a son
She should have - been a son
She should have - been a son

She should have stood out in the crowd
She should have made her mother proud
She should have fallen on her stance
She should have had another chance

[x2]
She should have - been a son
She should have - been a son
She should have - been a son
She should have - been a son

She should have stayed away from friends
She should have had more time to spend
She should have died when she was born
She should have worn the crown of thorns

She should have - been a son
She should have - been a son
She should have - been a son
She should have - been a son

Bell on door clanks - come on in
Floyd observes my hairy chin
Sit down (in the) chair, don't be afraid
Steamed hot towel on my face

I'm ashamed [x3]

Barney ties me to the chair
I can't see, I'm really scared
Floyd breathes hard, I hear a zip
Pee-Pee pressed against my lips

I was shamed [x3]

I sense others in the room
Opie Aunt Bee, I presume
They take turns and cut me up
I die smothered in Andy's clutch

I was shamed [x3]































..........

..........



...nevermind.

k

TL:DR

Л. Н. Толстой
Война и мир

Том первый

ЧАСТЬ ПЕРВАЯ.


I.



-- Еh bien, mon prince. Gênes et Lucques ne sont plus que des apanages, des поместья, de la famille Buonaparte. Non, je vous préviens, que si vous ne me dites pas, que nous avons la guerre, si vous vous permettez encore de pallier toutes les infamies, toutes les atrocités de cet Antichrist (ma parole, j'y crois) -- je ne vous connais plus, vous n'êtes plus mon ami, vous n'êtes plus мой верный раб, comme vous dites. 1 Ну, здравствуйте, здравствуйте. Je vois que je vous fais peur, 2 садитесь и рассказывайте.

Так говорила в июле 1805 года известная Анна Павловна Шерер, фрейлина и приближенная императрицы Марии Феодоровны, встречая важного и чиновного князя Василия, первого приехавшего на ее вечер. Анна Павловна кашляла несколько дней, у нее был грипп, как она говорила (грипп был тогда новое слово, употреблявшееся только редкими). В записочках, разосланных утром с красным лакеем, было написано без различия во всех:

"Si vous n'avez rien de mieux à faire, M. le comte (или mon prince), et si la perspective de passer la soirée chez une pauvre malade ne vous effraye pas trop, je serai charmée de vous voir chez moi entre 7 et 10 heures. Annette Scherer".3

-- Dieu, quelle virulente sortie 4 -- отвечал, нисколько не смутясь такою встречей, вошедший князь, в придворном, шитом мундире, в чулках, башмаках, при звездах, с светлым выражением плоского лица. Он говорил на том изысканном французском языке, на котором не только говорили, но и думали наши деды, и с теми тихими, покровительственными интонациями, которые свойственны состаревшемуся в свете и при дворе значительному человеку. Он подошел к Анне Павловне, поцеловал ее руку, подставив ей свою надушенную и сияющую лысину, и покойно уселся на диване.

-- Avant tout dites moi, comment vous allez, chère amie? 5 Успокойте друга, -- сказал он, не изменяя голоса и тоном, в котором из-за приличия и участия просвечивало равнодушие и даже насмешка.

-- Как можно быть здоровой... когда нравственно страдаешь? Разве можно оставаться спокойною в наше время, когда есть у человека чувство? -- сказала Анна Павловна. -- Вы весь вечер у меня, надеюсь?

-- А праздник английского посланника? Нынче середа. Мне надо показаться там, -- сказал князь. -- Дочь заедет за мной и повезет меня.

-- Я думала, что нынешний праздник отменен. Je vous avoue que toutes ces fêtes et tous ces feux d'artifice commencent à devenir insipides. 6

-- Ежели бы знали, что вы этого хотите, праздник бы отменили, -- сказал князь, по привычке, как заведенные часы, говоря вещи, которым он и не хотел, чтобы верили.

-- Ne me tourmentez pas. Eh bien, qu'a-t-on décidé par rapport à la dépêche de Novosiizoff? Vous savez tout. 7

-- Как вам сказать? -- сказал князь холодным, скучающим тоном. -- Qu'a-t-on décidé? On a décidé que Buonaparte a brûlé ses vaisseaux, et je crois que nous sommes en train de brûler les nôtres. 8 -- Князь Василий говорил всегда лениво, как актер говорит роль старой пиесы. Анна Павловна Шерер, напротив, несмотря на свои сорок лет, была преисполнена оживления и порывов.

Быть энтузиасткой сделалось ее общественным положением, и иногда, когда ей даже того не хотелось, она, чтобы не обмануть ожиданий людей, знавших ее, делалась энтузиасткой. Сдержанная улыбка, игравшая постоянно на лице Анны Павловны, хотя и не шла к ее отжившим чертам, выражала, как у избалованных детей, постоянное сознание своего милого недостатка, от которого она не хочет, не может и не находит нужным исправляться.

В середине разговора про политические действия Анна Павловна разгорячилась.

-- Ах, не говорите мне про Австрию! Я ничего не понимаю, может быть, но Австрия никогда не хотела и не хочет войны. Она предает нас. Россия одна должна быть спасительницей Европы. Наш благодетель знает свое высокое призвание и будет верен ему. Вот одно, во что я верю. Нашему доброму и чудному государю предстоит величайшая роль в мире, и он так добродетелен и хорош, что Бог не оставит его, и он исполнит свое призвание задавить гидру революции, которая теперь еще ужаснее в лице этого убийцы и злодея. Мы одни должны искупить кровь праведника... На кого нам надеяться, я вас спрашиваю?... Англия с своим коммерческим духом не поймет и не может понять всю высоту души императора Александра. Она отказалась очистить Мальту. Она хочет видеть, ищет заднюю мысль наших действий. Что они сказали Новосильцову?... Ничего. Они не поняли, они не могут понять самоотвержения нашего императора, который ничего не хочет для себя и всё хочет для блага мира. И что они обещали? Ничего. И что обещали, и того не будет! Пруссия уж объявила, что Бонапарте непобедим и что вся Европа ничего не может против него... И я не верю ни в одном слове ни Гарденбергу, ни Гаугвицу. Cette fameuse neutralité prussienne, ce n'est qu'un piège. 9 Я верю в одного Бога и в высокую судьбу нашего милого императора. Он спасет Европу!... -- Она вдруг остановилась с улыбкою насмешки над своею горячностью.

-- Я думаю, -- сказал князь улыбаясь, -- что ежели бы вас послали вместо нашего милого Винценгероде, вы бы взяли приступом согласие прусского короля. Вы так красноречивы. Вы дадите мне чаю?

-- Сейчас. A propos, -- прибавила она, опять успокоиваясь, -- нынче у меня два очень интересные человека, le vicomte de MorteMariet, il est allié aux Montmorency par les Rohans, 10 одна из лучших фамилий Франции. Это один из хороших эмигрантов, из настоящих. И потом l'abbé Morio: 11 вы знаете этот глубокий ум? Он был принят государем. Вы знаете?

-- А! Я очень рад буду, -- сказал князь. -- Скажите, -- прибавил он, как будто только что вспомнив что-то и особенно-небрежно, тогда как то, о чем он спрашивал, было главною целью его посещения, -- правда, что l'impératrice-mère 12 желает назначения барона Функе первым секретарем в Вену? C'est un pauvre sire, ce baron, à ce qu'il paraît. 13 -- Князь Василий желал определить сына на это место, которое через императрицу Марию Феодоровну старались доставить барону.

Анна Павловна почти закрыла глаза в знак того, что ни она, ни кто другой не могут судить про то, что угодно или нравится императрице.

-- Monsieur le baron de Funke a été recommandé à l'impératrice-mère par sa soeur, 14 -- только сказала она грустным, сухим тоном. В то время, как Анна Павловна назвала императрицу, лицо ее вдруг представило глубокое и искреннее выражение преданности и уважения, соединенное с грустью, что с ней бывало каждый раз, когда она в разговоре упоминала о своей высокой покровительнице. Она сказала, что ее величество изволила оказать барону Функе beaucoup d'estime, 15 и опять взгляд ее подернулся грустью.

Князь равнодушно замолк. Анна Павловна, с свойственною ей придворною и женскою ловкостью и быстротою такта, захотела и щелконуть князя за то, что он дерзнул так отозваться о лице, рекомендованном императрице, и в то же время утешить его.

-- Mais à propos de votre famille,16 -- сказала она, -- знаете ли, что ваша дочь с тех пор, как выезжает, fait les délices de tout le monde. On la trouve belle, comme le jour. 17

Князь наклонился в знак уважения и признательности.

-- Я часто думаю, -- продолжала Анна Павловна после минутного молчания, подвигаясь к князю и ласково улыбаясь ему, как будто выказывая этим, что политические и светские разговоры кончены и теперь начинается задушевный, -- я часто думаю, как иногда несправедливо распределяется счастие жизни. За что вам судьба дала таких двух славных детей (исключая Анатоля, вашего меньшого, я его не люблю, -- вставила она безапелляционно, приподняв брови) -- таких прелестных детей? А вы, право, менее всех цените их и потому их не стоите.

И она улыбнулась своею восторженною улыбкой.

-- Que voulez-vous? Lafater aurait dit que je n'ai pas la bosse de la paterienité, 18 -- сказал князь.

-- Перестаньте шутить. Я хотела серьезно поговорить с вами. Знаете, я недовольна вашим меньшим сыном. Между нами будь сказано (лицо ее приняло грустное выражение), о нем говорили у ее величества и жалеют вас...

Князь не отвечал, но она молча, значительно глядя на него, ждала ответа. Князь Василий поморщился.

-- Что вы хотите, чтоб я делал! -- сказал он наконец. -- Вы знаете, я сделал для их воспитания все, что может отец, и оба вышли des imbéciles.19 Ипполит, по крайней мере, покойный дурак, а Анатоль -- беспокойный. Вот одно различие, -- сказал он, улыбаясь более неестественно и одушевленно, чем обыкновенно, и при этом особенно резко выказывая в сложившихся около его рта морщинах что-то неожиданно-грубое и неприятное.

-- И зачем родятся дети у таких людей, как вы? Ежели бы вы не были отец, я бы ни в чем не могла упрекнуть вас, -- сказала Анна Павловна, задумчиво поднимая глаза.

-- Je suis votre 20 верный раб, et à vous seule je puis l'avouer. Мои дети -- ce sont les entraves de mon existence. 21 Это мой крест. Я так себе объясняю. Que voulez-vous?... 22 -- Он помолчал, выражая жестом свою покорность жестокой судьбе.

Анна Павловна задумалась.

-- Вы никогда не думали о том, чтобы женить вашего блудного сына Анатоля? Говорят, -- сказала она, -- что старые девицы ont la manie des Marieiages. 23 Я еще не чувствую за собою этой слабости, но у меня есть одна petite personne, 24 которая очень несчастлива с отцом, une parente à nous, une princesse 25 Болконская. -- Князь Василий не отвечал, хотя с свойственною светским людям быстротой соображения и памяти показал движением головы, что он принял к соображению эти сведения.

-- Нет, вы знаете ли, что этот Анатоль мне стоит 40 000 в год, -- сказал он, видимо, не в силах удерживать печальный ход своих мыслей. Он помолчал.

-- Что будет через пять лет, если это пойдет так? Voilà l'avantage d'être père. 26 Она богата, ваша княжна?

-- Отец очень богат и скуп. Он живет в деревне. Знаете, этот известный князь Болконский, отставленный еще при покойном императоре и прозванный прусским королем. Он очень умный человек, но со странностями и тяжелый. La pauvre petite est malheureuse, comme les pierres. 27 У нее брат, вот что недавно женился на Lise Мейнен, адъютант Кутузова. Он будет нынче у меня.

-- Ecoutez, chère Annette, 28 -- сказал князь, взяв вдруг свою собеседницу за руку и пригибая ее почему-то книзу. -- Arrangez-moi cette affaire et je suis votre 29 вернейший раб à tout jamais pan, comme mon староста m'écrit des 30 донесенья: покой-ер-п!. Она хорошей фамилии и богата. Всё, что мне нужно.

И он с теми свободными и фамильярными, грациозными движениями, которые его отличали, взял за руку фрейлину, поцеловал ее и, поцеловав, помахал фрейлинскою рукой, развалившись на креслах и глядя в сторону.

-- Attendez, 31 -- сказала Анна Павловна, соображая. -- Я нынче же поговорю Lise (la femme du jeune Болконский). 32 И, может быть, это уладится. Ce sera dans votre famille, que je ferai mon apprentissage de vieille fille. 33



II.


Гостиная Анны Павловны начала понемногу наполняться. Приехала высшая знать Петербурга, люди самые разнородные по возрастам и характерам, но одинаковые по обществу, в каком все жили; приехала дочь князя Василия, красавица Элен, заехавшая за отцом, чтобы с ним вместе ехать на праздник посланника. Она была в шифре и бальном платье. Приехала и известная, как la femme la plus séduisante de Pétersbourg, 34 молодая, маленькая княгиня Болконская, прошлую зиму вышедшая замуж и теперь не выезжавшая в большой свет по причине своей беременности, но ездившая еще на небольшие вечера. Приехал князь Ипполит, сын князя Василия, с Мортемаром, которого он представил; приехал и аббат Морио и многие другие.

-- Вы не видали еще? или: -- вы не знакомы с ma tante? 35 -- говорила Анна Павловна приезжавшим гостям и весьма серьезно подводила их к маленькой старушке в высоких бантах, выплывшей из другой комнаты, как скоро стали приезжать гости, называла их по имени, медленно переводя глаза с гостя на ma tante, 36 и потом отходила.

Все гости совершали обряд приветствования никому неизвестной, никому неинтересной и ненужной тетушки. Анна Павловна с грустным, торжественным участием следила за их приветствиями, молчаливо одобряя их. Ma tante каждому говорила в одних и тех же выражениях о его здоровье, о своем здоровье и о здоровье ее величества, которое нынче было, слава Богу, лучше. Все подходившие, из приличия не выказывая поспешности, с чувством облегчения исполненной тяжелой обязанности отходили от старушки, чтобы уж весь вечер ни разу не подойти к ней.

Молодая княгиня Болконская приехала с работой в шитом золотом бархатном мешке. Ее хорошенькая, с чуть черневшимися усиками верхняя губка была коротка по зубам, но тем милее она открывалась и тем еще милее вытягивалась иногда и опускалась на нижнюю. Как это всегда бывает у вполне-привлекательных женщин, недостаток ее -- короткость губы и полуоткрытый рот -- казались ее особенною, собственно ее красотой. Всем было весело смотреть на эту, полную здоровья и живости, хорошенькую будущую мать, так легко переносившую свое положение. Старикам и скучающим, мрачным молодым людям, смотревшим на нее, казалось, что они сами делаются похожи на нее, побыв и поговорив несколько времени с ней. Кто говорил с ней и видел при каждом слове ее светлую улыбочку и блестящие белые зубы, которые виднелись беспрестанно, тот думал, что он особенно нынче любезен. И это думал каждый.

Маленькая княгиня, переваливаясь, маленькими быстрыми шажками обошла стол с рабочею сумочкою на руке и, весело оправляя платье, села на диван, около серебряного самовара, как будто всё, что она ни делала, было part de plaisir 37 для нее и для всех ее окружавших.

-- J'ai apporté mon ouvrage, 38 -- сказала она, развертывая свой ридикюль и обращаясь ко всем вместе.

-- Смотрите, Annette, ne me jouez pas un mauvais tour, -- обратилась она к хозяйке. -- Vous m'avez écrit, que c'était une toute petite soirée; voyez, comme je suis attifée. 39

И она развела руками, чтобы показать свое, в кружевах, серенькое изящное платье, немного ниже грудей опоясанное широкою лентой.

-- Soyez tranquille, Lise, vous serez toujours la plus jolie, 40 -- отвечала Анна Павловна.

-- Vous savez, mon mari m'abandonne, -- продолжала она тем же тоном, обращаясь к генералу, -- il va se faire tuer. Dites moi, pourquoi cette vilaine guerre, 41 -- сказала она князю Василию и, не дожидаясь ответа, обратилась к дочери князя Василия, к красивой Элен.

-- Quelle délicieuse personne, que cette petite princesse! 42 -- сказал князь Василий тихо Анне Павловне.

Вскоре после маленькой княгини вошел массивный, толстый молодой человек с стриженою головой, в очках, светлых панталонах по тогдашней моде, с высоким жабо и в коричневом фраке. Этот толстый молодой человек был незаконный сын знаменитого Екатерининского вельможи, графа Безухого, умиравшего теперь в Москве. Он нигде не служил еще, только что приехал из-за границы, где он воспитывался, и был в первый раз в обществе. Анна Павловна приветствовала его поклоном, относящимся к людям самой низшей иерархии в ее салоне. Но, несмотря на это низшее по своему сорту приветствие, при виде вошедшего Пьера в лице Анны Павловны изобразилось беспокойство и страх, подобный тому, который выражается при виде чего-нибудь слишком огромного и несвойственного месту. Хотя, действительно, Пьер был несколько больше других мужчин в комнате, но этот страх мог относиться только к тому умному и вместе робкому, наблюдательному и естественному взгляду, отличавшему его от всех в этой гостиной.

-- C'est bien aimable à vous, monsieur Pierre, d'être venu voir une pauvre malade, 43 -- сказала ему Анна Павловна, испуганно переглядываясь с тетушкой, к которой она подводила его. Пьер пробурлил что-то непонятное и продолжал отыскивать что-то глазами. Он радостно, весело улыбнулся, кланяясь маленькой княгине, как близкой знакомой, и подошел к тетушке. Страх Анны Павловны был не напрасен, потому что Пьер, не дослушав речи тетушки о здоровье ее величества, отошел от нее. Анна Павловна испуганно остановила его словами:

-- Вы не знаете аббата Морио? он очень интересный человек... -- сказала она.

-- Да, я слышал про его план вечного мира, и это очень интересно, но едва ли возможно...

-- Вы думаете?... -- сказала Анна Павловна, чтобы сказать что-нибудь и вновь обратиться к своим занятиям хозяйки дома, но Пьер сделал обратную неучтивость. Прежде он, не дослушав слов собеседницы, ушел; теперь он остановил своим разговором собеседницу, которой нужно было от него уйти. Он, нагнув голову и расставив большие ноги, стал доказывать Анне Павловне, почему он полагал, что план аббата был химера.

-- Мы после поговорим, -- сказала Анна Павловна, улыбаясь.

И, отделавшись от молодого человека, не умеющего жить, она возвратилась к своим занятиям хозяйки дома и продолжала прислушиваться и приглядываться, готовая подать помощь на тот пункт, где ослабевал разговор. Как хозяин прядильной мастерской, посадив работников по местам, прохаживается по заведению, замечая неподвижность или непривычный, скрипящий, слишком громкий звук веретена, торопливо идет, сдерживает или пускает его в надлежащий ход, так и Анна Павловна, прохаживаясь по своей гостиной, подходила к замолкнувшему или слишком много говорившему кружку и одним словом или перемещением опять заводила равномерную, приличную разговорную машину. Но среди этих забот всё виден был в ней особенный страх за Пьера. Она заботливо поглядывала на него в то время, как он подошел послушать то, что говорилось около Мортемара, и отошел к другому кружку, где говорил аббат. Для Пьера, воспитанного за границей, этот вечер Анны Павловны был первый, который он видел в России. Он знал, что тут собрана вся интеллигенция Петербурга, и у него, как у ребенка в игрушечной лавке, разбегались глаза. Он всё боялся пропустить умные разговоры, которые он может услыхать. Глядя на уверенные и изящные выражения лиц, собранных здесь, он всё ждал чего-нибудь особенно умного. Наконец, он подошел к Морио. Разговор показался ему интересен, и он остановился, ожидая случая высказать свои мысли, как это любят молодые люди.



III.


Вечер Анны Павловны был пущен. Веретена с разных сторон равномерно и не умолкая шумели. Кроме ma tante, около которой сидела только одна пожилая дама с исплаканным, худым лицом, несколько чужая в этом блестящем обществе, общество разбилось на три кружка. В одном, более мужском, центром был аббат; в другом, молодом, красавица-княжна Элен, дочь князя Василия, и хорошенькая, румяная, слишком полная по своей молодости, маленькая княгиня Болконская. В третьем Мортемар и Анна Павловна.

Виконт был миловидный, с мягкими чертами и приемами, молодой человек, очевидно считавший себя знаменитостью, но, по благовоспитанности, скромно предоставлявший пользоваться собой тому обществу, в котором он находился. Анна Павловна, очевидно, угощала им своих гостей. Как хороший метрд`отель подает как нечто сверхъестественно-прекрасное тот кусок говядины, который есть не захочется, если увидать его в грязной кухне, так в нынешний вечер Анна Павловна сервировала своим гостям сначала виконта, потом аббата, как что-то сверхъестественно утонченное. В кружке Мортемара заговорили тотчас об убиении герцога Энгиенского. Виконт сказал, что герцог Энгиенский погиб от своего великодушия, и что были особенные причины озлобления Бонапарта.

-- Ah! voyons. Contez-nous cela, vicomte, 44 -- сказала Анна Павловна, с радостью чувствуя, как чем-то à la Louis XV 45 отзывалась эта фраза, -- contez-nous cela, vicomte.

Виконт поклонился в знак покорности и учтиво улыбнулся. Анна Павловна сделала круг около виконта и пригласила всех слушать его рассказ.

-- Le vicomte a été personnellement connu de monseigneur, 46 -- шепнула Анна Павловна одному. -- Le vicomte est un parfait conteur, 47 -- проговорила она другому. -- Comme on voit l'homme de la bonne compagnie, 48 -- сказала она третьему; и виконт был подан обществу в самом изящном и выгодном для него свете, как ростбиф на горячем блюде, посыпанный зеленью.

Виконт хотел уже начать свой рассказ и тонко улыбнулся.

-- Переходите сюда, chère Hélène, 49 -- сказала Анна Павловна красавице-княжне, которая сидела поодаль, составляя центр другого кружка.

Княжна Элен улыбалась; она поднялась с тою же неизменяющеюся улыбкой вполне красивой женщины, с которою она вошла в гостиную. Слегка шумя своею белою бальною робой, убранною плющем и мохом, и блестя белизною плеч, глянцем волос и брильянтов, она прошла между расступившимися мужчинами и прямо, не глядя ни на кого, но всем улыбаясь и как бы любезно предоставляя каждому право любоваться красотою своего стана, полных плеч, очень открытой, по тогдашней моде, груди и спины, и как будто внося с собою блеск бала, подошла к Анне Павловне. Элен была так хороша, что не только не было в ней заметно и тени кокетства, но, напротив, ей как будто совестно было за свою несомненную и слишком сильно и победительно-действующую красоту. Она как будто желала и не могла умалить действие своей красоты. Quelle belle personne! 50 говорил каждый, кто ее видел.

Как будто пораженный чем-то необычайным, виконт пожал плечами и о опустил глаза в то время, как она усаживалась перед ним и освещала и его всё тою же неизменною улыбкой.

-- Madame, je crains pour mes moyens devant un pareil auditoire, 51 сказал он, наклоняя с улыбкой голову.

Княжна облокотила свою открытую полную руку на столик и не нашла нужным что-либо сказать. Она улыбаясь ждала. Во все время рассказа она сидела прямо, посматривая изредка то на свою полную красивую руку, которая от давления на стол изменила свою форму, то на еще более красивую грудь, на которой она поправляла брильянтовое ожерелье; поправляла несколько раз складки своего платья и, когда рассказ производил впечатление, оглядывалась на Анну Павловну и тотчас же принимала то самое выражение, которое было на лице фрейлины, и потом опять успокоивалась в сияющей улыбке. Вслед за Элен перешла и маленькая княгиня от чайного стола.

-- Attendez moi, je vais prendre mon ouvrage,52 -- проговорила она. -- Voyons, à quoi pensez-vous? -- обратилась она к князю Ипполиту: -- apportez-moi mon ridicule.53

Княгиня, улыбаясь и говоря со всеми, вдруг произвела перестановку и, усевшись, весело оправилась.

-- Теперь мне хорошо, -- приговаривала она и, попросив начинать, принялась за работу.

Князь Ипполит перенес ей ридикюль, перешел за нею и, близко придвинув к ней кресло, сел подле нее.

Le charmant Hippolyte 54 поражал своим необыкновенным сходством с сестрою-красавицей и еще более тем, что, несмотря на сходство, он был поразительно дурен собой. Черты его лица были те же, как и у сестры, но у той все освещалось жизнерадостною, самодовольною, молодою, неизменною улыбкой жизни и необычайною, античною красотой тела; у брата, напротив, то же лицо было отуманено идиотизмом и неизменно выражало самоуверенную брюзгливость, а тело было худощаво и слабо. Глаза, нос, рот -- все сжималось как будто в одну неопределенную и скучную гримасу, а руки и ноги всегда принимали неестественное положение.

-- Ce n'est pas une histoire de revenants? 55 -- сказал он, усевшись подле княгини и торопливо пристроив к глазам свой лорнет, как будто без этого инструмента он не мог начать говорить.

-- Mais non, mon cher, 56 -- пожимая плечами, сказал удивленный рассказчик.

-- C'est que je déteste les histoires de revenants, 57 -- сказал он таким тоном, что видно было, -- он сказал эти слова, а потом уже понял, что они значили.

Из-за самоуверенности, с которой он говорил, никто не мог понять, очень ли умно или очень глупо то, что он сказал. Он был в темнозеленом фраке, в панталонах цвета cuisse de nymphe effrayée, 58 как он сам говорил, в чулках и башмаках.

Vicomte 59 рассказал очень мило о том ходившем тогда анекдоте, что герцог Энгиенский тайно ездил в Париж для свидания с m-lle George, 60 и что там он встретился с Бонапарте, пользовавшимся тоже милостями знаменитой актрисы, и что там, встретившись с герцогом, Наполеон случайно упал в тот обморок, которому он был подвержен, и находился во власти герцога, которой герцог не воспользовался, но что Бонапарте впоследствии за это-то великодушие и отмстил смертью герцогу.

Рассказ был очень мил и интересен, особенно в том месте, где соперники вдруг узнают друг друга, и дамы, казалось, были в волнении.

-- Charmant, 61 -- сказала Анна Павловна, оглядываясь вопросительно на маленькую княгиню.

-- Charmant, -- прошептала маленькая княгиня, втыкая иголку в работу, как будто в знак того, что интерес и прелесть рассказа мешают ей продолжать работу.

Виконт оценил эту молчаливую похвалу и, благодарно улыбнувшись, стал продолжать; но в это время Анна Павловна, все поглядывавшая на страшного для нее молодого человека, заметила, что он что-то слишком горячо и громко говорит с аббатом, и поспешила на помощь к опасному месту. Действительно, Пьеру удалось завязать с аббатом разговор о политическом равновесии, и аббат, видимо заинтересованный простодушной горячностью молодого человека, развивал перед ним свою любимую идею. Оба слишком оживленно и естественно слушали и говорили, и это-то не понравилось Анне Павловне.

-- Средство -- Европейское равновесие и droit des gens, 62 -- говорил аббат. -- Стоит одному могущественному государству, как Россия, прославленному за варварство, стать бескорыстно во главе союза, имеющего целью равновесие Европы, -- и она спасет мир!

-- Как же вы найдете такое равновесие? -- начал было Пьер; но в это время подошла Анна Павловна и, строго взглянув на Пьера, спросила итальянца о том, как он переносит здешний климат. Лицо итальянца вдруг изменилось и приняло оскорбительно притворно-сладкое выражение, которое, видимо, было привычно ему в разговоре с женщинами.

-- Я так очарован прелестями ума и образования общества, в особенности женского, в которое я имел счастье быть принят, что не успел еще подумать о климате, -- сказал он.

Не выпуская уже аббата и Пьера, Анна Павловна для удобства наблюдения присоединила их к общему кружку.

IV.


В это время в гостиную вошло новое лицо. Новое лицо это был молодой князь Андрей Болконский, муж маленькой княгини. Князь Болконский был небольшого роста, весьма красивый молодой человек с определенными и сухими чертами. Всё в его фигуре, начиная от усталого, скучающего взгляда до тихого мерного шага, представляло самую резкую противоположность с его маленькою, оживленною женой. Ему, видимо, все бывшие в гостиной не только были знакомы, но уж надоели ему так, что и смотреть на них и слушать их ему было очень скучно. Из всех же прискучивших ему лиц, лицо его хорошенькой жены, казалось, больше всех ему надоело. С гримасой, портившею его красивое лицо, он отвернулся от нее. Он поцеловал руку Анны Павловны и, щурясь, оглядел всё общество.

-- Vous vous enrôlez pour la guerre, mon prince? 63 -- сказала Анна Павловна.

-- Le général Koutouzoff, -- сказал Болконский, ударяя на последнем слоге zoff, как француз, -- a bien voulu de moi pour aide-de-camp... 64

-- Et Lise, votre femme? 65

-- Она поедет в деревню.

-- Как вам не грех лишать нас вашей прелестной жены?

-- André, 66 -- сказала его жена, обращаясь к мужу тем же кокетливым тоном, каким она обращалась к посторонним, -- какую историю нам рассказал виконт о m-lle Жорж и Бонапарте!

Князь Андрей зажмурился и отвернулся. Пьер, со времени входа князя Андрея в гостиную не спускавший с него радостных, дружелюбных глаз, подошел к нему и взял его за руку. Князь Андрей, не оглядываясь, морщил лицо в гримасу, выражавшую досаду на того, кто трогает его за руку, но, увидав улыбающееся лицо Пьера, улыбнулся неожиданно-доброй и приятной улыбкой.

-- Вот как!... И ты в большом свете! -- сказал он Пьеру.

-- Я знал, что вы будете, -- отвечал Пьер. -- Я приеду к вам ужинать, -- прибавил он тихо, чтобы не мешать виконту, который продолжал свой рассказ. -- Можно?

-- Нет, нельзя, -- сказал князь Андрей смеясь, пожатием руки давая знать Пьеру, что этого не нужно спрашивать.

Он что-то хотел сказать еще, но в это время поднялся князь Василий с дочерью, и два молодых человека встали, чтобы дать им дорогу.

-- Вы меня извините, мой милый виконт, -- сказал князь Василий французу, ласково притягивая его за рукав вниз к стулу, чтоб он не вставал. -- Этот несчастный праздник у посланника лишает меня удовольствия и прерывает вас. Очень мне грустно покидать ваш восхитительный вечер, -- сказал он Анне Павловне.

Дочь его, княжна Элен, слегка придерживая складки платья, пошла между стульев, и улыбка сияла еще светлее на ее прекрасном лице. Пьер смотрел почти испуганными, восторженными глазами на эту красавицу, когда она проходила мимо него.

-- Очень хороша, -- сказал князь Андрей.

-- Очень, -- сказал Пьер.

Проходя мимо, князь Василий схватил Пьера за руку и обратился к Анне Павловне.

-- Образуйте мне этого медведя, -- сказал он. -- Вот он месяц живет у меня, и в первый раз я его вижу в свете. Ничто так не нужно молодому человеку, как общество умных женщин.



V.


Анна Павловна улыбнулась и обещалась заняться Пьером, который, она знала, приходился родня по отцу князю Василью. Пожилая дама, сидевшая прежде с ma tante, торопливо встала и догнала князя Василья в передней. С лица ее исчезла вся прежняя притворность интереса. Доброе, исплаканное лицо ее выражало только беспокойство и страх.

-- Что же вы мне скажете, князь, о моем Борисе? -- сказала она, догоняя его в передней. (Она выговаривала имя Борис с особенным ударением на о). -- Я не могу оставаться дольше в Петербурге. Скажите, какие известия я могу привезти моему бедному мальчику?

Несмотря на то, что князь Василий неохотно и почти неучтиво слушал пожилую даму и даже выказывал нетерпение, она ласково и трогательно улыбалась ему и, чтоб он не ушел, взяла его за руку.

-- Что вам стоит сказать слово государю, и он прямо будет переведен в гвардию, -- просила она.

-- Поверьте, что я сделаю всё, что могу, княгиня, -- отвечал князь Василий, -- но мне трудно просить государя; я бы советовал вам обратиться к Румянцеву, через князя Голицына: это было бы умнее.

Пожилая дама носила имя княгини Друбецкой, одной из лучших фамилий России, но она была бедна, давно вышла из света и утратила прежние связи. Она приехала теперь, чтобы выхлопотать определение в гвардию своему единственному сыну. Только затем, чтоб увидеть князя Василия, она назвалась и приехала на вечер к Анне Павловне, только затем она слушала историю виконта. Она испугалась слов князя Василия; когда-то красивое лицо ее выразило озлобление, но это продолжалось только минуту. Она опять улыбнулась и крепче схватила за руку князя Василия.

-- Послушайте, князь, -- сказала она, -- я никогда не просила вас, никогда не буду просить, никогда не напоминала вам о дружбе моего отца к вам. Но теперь, я Богом заклинаю вас, сделайте это для моего сына, и я буду считать вас благодетелем, -- торопливо прибавила она. -- Нет, вы не сердитесь, а вы обещайте мне. Я просила Голицына, он отказал. Soyez le bon enfant que vous аvez été, 67 -- говорила она, стараясь улыбаться, тогда как в ее глазах были слезы.

-- Папа, мы опоздаем, -- сказала, повернув свою красивую голову на античных плечах, княжна Элен, ожидавшая у двери.

Но влияние в свете есть капитал, который надо беречь, чтоб он не исчез. Князь Василий знал это, и, раз сообразив, что ежели бы он стал просить за всех, кто его просит, то вскоре ему нельзя было бы просить за себя, он редко употреблял свое влияние. В деле княгини Друбецкой он почувствовал, однако, после ее нового призыва, что-то вроде укора совести. Она напомнила ему правду: первыми шагами своими в службе он был обязан ее отцу. Кроме того, он видел по ее приемам, что она -- одна из тех женщин, особенно матерей, которые, однажды взяв себе что-нибудь в голову, не отстанут до тех пор, пока не исполнят их желания, а в противном случае готовы на ежедневные, ежеминутные приставания и даже на сцены. Это последнее соображение поколебало его.

-- Chère Анна Михайловна, -- сказал он с своею всегдашнею фамильярностью и скукой в голосе, -- для меня почти невозможно сделать то, что вы хотите; но чтобы доказать вам, как я люблю вас и чту память покойного отца вашего, я сделаю невозможное: сын ваш будет переведен в гвардию, вот вам моя рука. Довольны вы?

-- Милый мой, вы благодетель! Я иного и не ждала от вас; я знала, как вы добры.

Он хотел уйти.

-- Постойте, два слова. Une fois passé aux gardes... 68 -- Она замялась: -- Вы хороши с Михаилом Иларионовичем Кутузовым, рекомендуйте ему Бориса в адъютанты. Тогда бы я была покойна, и тогда бы уж...

Князь Василий улыбнулся.

-- Этого не обещаю. Вы не знаете, как осаждают Кутузова с тех пор, как он назначен главнокомандующим. Он мне сам говорил, что все московские барыни сговорились отдать ему всех своих детей в адъютанты.

-- Нет, обещайте, я не пущу вас, милый, благодетель мой...

-- Папа! -- опять тем же тоном повторила красавица, -- мы опоздаем.

-- Ну, au revoir, 69 прощайте. Видите?

-- Так завтра вы доложите государю?

-- Непременно, а Кутузову не обещаю.

-- Нет, обещайте, обещайте, Basile, 70 -- сказала вслед ему Анна Михайловна, с улыбкой молодой кокетки, которая когда-то, должно быть, была ей свойственна, а теперь так не шла к ее истощенному лицу.

Она, видимо, забыла свои годы и пускала в ход, по привычке, все старинные женские средства. Но как только он вышел, лицо ее опять приняло то же холодное, притворное выражение, которое было на нем прежде. Она вернулась к кружку, в котором виконт продолжал рассказывать, и опять сделала вид, что слушает, дожидаясь времени уехать, так как дело ее было сделано.

-- Но как вы находите всю эту последнюю комедию du sacre de Milan? 71 -- сказала Анна Павловна. Et la nouvelle comédie des peuples de Gênes et de Lucques, qui viennent présenter leurs voeux à M. Buonaparte assis sur un trône, et exauçant les voeux des nations! Adorable! Non, mais c'est à en devenir folle! On dirait, que le monde entier a perdu la tête. 72

Князь Андрей усмехнулся, прямо глядя в лицо Анны Павловны.

-- "Dieu me la donne, gare à qui la touche", -- сказал он (слова Бонапарте, сказанные при возложении короны). -- On dit qu'il a été très beau en prononçant ces paroles, 73 -- прибавил он и еще раз повторил эти слова по-итальянски: "Dio mi la dona, guai a chi la tocca".

-- J'espère enfin, -- продолжала Анна Павловна, -- que ça a été la goutte d'eau qui fera déborder le verre. Les souverains ne peuvent plus supporter cet homme, qui menace tout. 74

-- Les souverains? Je ne parle pas de la Russie, -- сказал виконт учтиво и безнадежно: -- Les souverains, madame! Qu'ont ils fait pour Louis XVII, pour la reine, pour madame Elisabeth? Rien, -- продолжал он одушевляясь. -- Et croyez-moi, ils subissent la punition pour leur trahison de la cause des Bourbons. Les souverains? Ils envoient des ambassadeurs complimenter l'usurpateur. 75

И он, презрительно вздохнув, опять переменил положение. Князь Ипполит, долго смотревший в лорнет на виконта, вдруг при этих словах повернулся всем телом к маленькой княгине и, попросив у нее иголку, стал показывать ей, рисуя иголкой на столе, герб Конде. Он растолковывал ей этот герб с таким значительным видом, как будто княгиня просила его об этом.

-- Bâton de gueules, engrêlé de gueules d'azur -- maison Condé,76 -- говорил он.

Княгиня, улыбаясь, слушала.

-- Ежели еще год Бонапарте останется на престоле Франции, -- продолжал виконт начатый разговор, с видом человека не слушающего других, но в деле, лучше всех ему известном, следящего только за ходом своих мыслей, -- то дела пойдут слишком далеко. Интригой, насилием, изгнаниями, казнями общество, я разумею хорошее общество, французское, навсегда будет уничтожено, и тогда...

Он пожал плечами и развел руками. Пьер хотел было сказать что-то: разговор интересовал его, но Анна Павловна, караулившая его, перебила.

-- Император Александр, -- сказала она с грустью, сопутствовавшей всегда ее речам об императорской фамилии, -- объявил, что он предоставит самим французам выбрать образ правления. И я думаю, нет сомнения, что вся нация, освободившись от узурпатора, бросится в руки законного короля, -- сказала Анна Павловна, стараясь быть любезной с эмигрантом и роялистом.

-- Это сомнительно, -- сказал князь Андрей. -- Monsieur le vicomte 77 совершенно справедливо полагает, что дела зашли уже слишком далеко. Я думаю, что трудно будет возвратиться к старому.

-- Сколько я слышал, -- краснея, опять вмешался в разговор Пьер, -- почти всё дворянство перешло уже на сторону Бонапарта.

-- Это говорят бонапартисты, -- сказал виконт, не глядя на Пьера. -- Теперь трудно узнать общественное мнение Франции.

-- Bonaparte l'a dit, 78 -- сказал князь Андрей с усмешкой.

(Видно было, что виконт ему не нравился, и что он, хотя и не смотрел на него, против него обращал свои речи.)

-- "Je leur ai montré le chemin de la gloire" -- сказал он после недолгого молчания, опять повторяя слова Наполеона: -- "ils n'en ont pas voulu; je leur ai ouvert mes antichambres, ils se sont précipités en foule"... Je ne sais pas à quel point il a eu le droit de le dire. 79

-- Aucun, 80 -- возразил виконт. -- После убийства герцога даже самые пристрастные люди перестали видеть в нем героя. Si même ça a été un héros pour certaines gens, -- сказал виконт, обращаясь к Анне Павловне, -- depuis l'assassinat du duc il y a un Marietyr de plus dans le ciel, un héros de moins sur la terre.81

Не успели еще Анна Павловна и другие улыбкой оценить этих слов виконта, как Пьер опять ворвался в разговор, и Анна Павловна, хотя и предчувствовавшая, что он скажет что-нибудь неприличное, уже не могла остановить его.

-- Казнь герцога Энгиенского, -- сказал мсье Пьер, -- была государственная необходимость; и я именно вижу величие души в том, что Наполеон не побоялся принять на себя одного ответственность в этом поступке.

-- Dieul mon Dieu!82 -- страшным шопотом проговорила Анна Павловна.

-- Comment, M. Pierre, vous trouvez que l'assassinat est grandeur d'âme, 83 -- сказала маленькая княгиня, улыбаясь и придвигая к себе работу.

-- Ah! Oh! -- сказали разные голоса.

-- Capital!84 -- по-английски сказал князь Ипполит и принялся бить себя ладонью по коленке.

Виконт только пожал плечами. Пьер торжественно посмотрел поверх очков на слушателей.

-- Я потому так говорю, -- продолжал он с отчаянностью, -- что Бурбоны бежали от революции, предоставив народ анархии; а один Наполеон умел понять революцию, победить ее, и потому для общего блага он не мог остановиться перед жизнью одного человека.

-- Не хотите ли перейти к тому столу? -- сказала Анна Павловна.

Но Пьер, не отвечая, продолжал свою речь.










lol 2^16 - 1 character limit nice

oh god ice 2_2

djufhsiaghyHGruoghsuohgHGERUOhfiwego

Look! I'm spamming!

Ban him!

He won't even know what'll be hitting him.

7000th post in this forum section!

I'am much good spammer!

Laughing my ass off!!!!!

Dis comment is SPAMSPAMSPAMSPAMSPAMSP- [Notch] Clubie99 was banned from Minecraft.

Amazing song, my new favourite!

Test spam

Test spam xD

     

How do I stop laughing xD

I want to spam this, but I do not know what to write

Don't worry, you did a good job.

Edev go check BartandLisa's school app fggt or i he'll keel u. (He's pretty damn impatient)

I'm a veteran and not approved to check applications.

blup 

Nuuppanaani's one hundredth post:

Fck u Evil.

Hi nuu

Who doesn't love Nuu <3

(05-26-2014, 09:17 PM)EDevil Wrote: [ -> ]Who doesn't love Nuu <3

Heterosexual individuals

uh... I have some problems understanding this...

Why isn't anyone spamming here?

sdasdasFSADGBIFJHASDF;GDAFKDFLDFHGFSDG
'LADFG
LDFG
'LDFG'
DAFG
D'FGDF
'G;FD
'G;DFS
GD;G
;FG
';
';
';
';
;
';
;
;
;
;
;
;
; java

cut, I warn you of the verbosity of java
stop before you get the wrong idea of what productivity is

dadadadaaa
dadadadaaaa


dadadddadadadadaddadaddaddaddadadadadaaaaaaadaaadaddadaaadadadadaaaaa

what song is this

Darude - Sandstorm.

no that's dududu

http://www.churchofsatan.com/

(07-29-2014, 01:55 AM)͝ ͟ ͜ Wrote: [ -> ]http://www.churchofsatan.com/

wtf xD

http://www.venganza.org/
bitch please

virt your signature is an eyesore

(07-29-2014, 01:39 PM)VirtualPineapple Wrote: [ -> ]http://www.venganza.org/
bitch please

W.T.F.

It makes so much sense now ! Quick, everyone become a pirate to stop global warming

I (5 character limit)

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felt (5 character limit)

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the (5 character limit)

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need (5 character limit)

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to (5 character limit)

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spam (5 character limit)

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it's funny how none of these words are longer og equal to 5 characters

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also this is what happens when you have posted the last reply and you post another one right after

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this really sucks

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I can't really spam with more than one post

lol (5 c. limit)

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this (5 c. limit)

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is (5 c. limit)

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cool (5 c. limit)

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spam (5 c. limit)

lol  

spoom!

stop it guys

k (5 character limit)

n****s copy everthang we say louie framz eyes lowera than mah GPA

how do you have more posts than me

k . .

Is this thread still a thing. I don't think I've ever posted here.

Actually, you've posted in this thread 11 times.

We need more crazy shit

!Derp - I done did a xeo



PS. I'm aware the cursor looks dodgy as hell, I couldn't figure out a clever way to screenie it ;_;

tiem to get 75 posts dammit

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mm bb u so fien

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wut a minute ererere

Lol no one loves you nuup

bumping up the spam thred mwhehehe

i almost hit 1000

I just took the Minecraft Noob test! Check out what I scored. Think you can beat me?!


To take the test, check out
http://minecraftnoobtest.com/test.php

kkk  

Oh shit.

the doooooor charlie ! The Door is everything !

pooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooop

find the 0 (zero)

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo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if you find the 0 (zero) you are genius if you find the Q you are good , find the x and you are a genius duck


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Control + F still delivers

(11-14-2014, 07:30 AM)Coolt5000 Wrote: [ -> ]bumping up the spam thred mwhehehe

'Tis 'bout the time for such things to happen! Come, my trusty thane, and survey the threads. Mayhaps you will find one that thee can call home.

I am a genious duck!!!!!!!


#recognition

ifyouspenttimeaddingspacesintothissentenceyouhavenolifebecuaseissuchahardworktodohehbetterileavenowthefreespambecauseanyonereallycaresaboutspamrightthenidecidedtostopbutthenidecidedtostopbutthenidecidedtocontinuelolololthisissofunnyhaveyouevenreadtheispleaseifyoudidreadthissaykekrimasaresponsetothisthreadiwanttodothistocheckhowmanytardsarerighthererightnowwhyimstilltypingwelliwassurprisedaboutatwentyfoursevenspamthreadwhereyoucanalwaystypelolololsofunnyhahahaokileavegoodbye

kekrim, and I'm not a tard

lyk w0t omg stahp bumpin dis tread

but dis tread is layfe

(03-04-2014, 04:17 PM)Dcentrics Wrote: [ -> ]dd

wat?

the title states that we should spam 24/7 and we have failed.

how doo i lok tread u neet 2 stap bumps

I've said this before but since this thread seems to have become active again I'll say it again: Generally, the post count of an individual is indicative of their experience within the community. Many individuals (including myself) likely don't wish for the recognition of their well-thought-out and genuinely proactive posts to become diluted by threads such as these (which really serve no other purpose in my eyes). That somewhat ruins the whole point of having a post count in the first place. Just something to think about.

(03-19-2016, 06:46 AM)newomaster Wrote: [ -> ]I've said this before but since this thread seems to have become active again I'll say it again: Generally, the post count of an individual is indicative of their experience within the community. Many individuals (including myself) likely don't wish for the recognition of their well-thought-out and genuinely proactive posts to become diluted by threads such as these (which really serve no other purpose in my eyes). That somewhat ruins the whole point of having a post count in the first place. Just something to think about.

Post count isn't really indacative of experience... What if you just post really dumb responses to things, like josh0322?

But I can spam here :3

no you can't go away

(03-20-2016, 07:04 PM)Apuly Wrote: [ -> ]no you can't go away

ibtl

*wet fart*

Is this still a thing?

No go away

(03-19-2016, 11:22 AM)slugdude Wrote: [ -> ]

(03-19-2016, 06:46 AM)newomaster Wrote: [ -> ]I've said this before but since this thread seems to have become active again I'll say it again: Generally, the post count of an individual is indicative of their experience within the community. Many individuals (including myself) likely don't wish for the recognition of their well-thought-out and genuinely proactive posts to become diluted by threads such as these (which really serve no other purpose in my eyes). That somewhat ruins the whole point of having a post count in the first place. Just something to think about.

Post count isn't really indacative of experience... What if you just post really dumb responses to things, like josh0322?

mah feelings

(06-23-2016, 12:20 AM)josh03222 Wrote: [ -> ]

(03-19-2016, 11:22 AM)slugdude Wrote: [ -> ]

(03-19-2016, 06:46 AM)newomaster Wrote: [ -> ]I've said this before but since this thread seems to have become active again I'll say it again: Generally, the post count of an individual is indicative of their experience within the community. Many individuals (including myself) likely don't wish for the recognition of their well-thought-out and genuinely proactive posts to become diluted by threads such as these (which really serve no other purpose in my eyes). That somewhat ruins the whole point of having a post count in the first place. Just something to think about.

Post count isn't really indacative of experience... What if you just post really dumb responses to things, like josh0322?

mah feelings

Three months later and he finally responds

Better late than never

fair point

fair point

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(06-23-2016, 08:48 PM)TheRedCrafter344 Wrote: [ -> ]QUACK QUACK POOTATOES QUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOSQUACK QUACK POOTATOS

go away

(06-24-2016, 12:41 AM)josh03222 Wrote: [ -> ]go away

No

werwrwerwerewrewrewrewrerewrwere wrewr SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM

you better watch out or I'm gonna ban you for spam

(06-26-2016, 03:07 PM)Apuly Wrote: [ -> ]you better watch out or I'm gonna ban you for spam

(06-25-2016, 12:07 PM)Apuly Wrote: [ -> ]I honestly don't mind the shitposting, as long as it stays in Shenanigans

Rekt by self

1: You can't shitpost in this thread
2: Nothing in this thread is serious
3: Stop being an idiot m8
4:

Rekd by self

(06-26-2016, 10:35 PM)Apuly Wrote: [ -> ]1: You can't shitpost in this thread
2: Nothing in this thread is serious
3: Stop being an idiot m8
4:

Rekd by self

1. Who made you god of shitposting?
2. Fair point.
3. No.
4. I do that because xray wants me to

1: nobody. I'm not. josh is.
2: cyka blyat noob team
3: git gud
4: I don't give a fuck if xray wants you to do it. if you're going to spam somebody, you shouldn't mind being spammed back. if you do mind you're a fokn hypocrite.

(06-27-2016, 06:28 PM)Apuly Wrote: [ -> ]1: nobody. I'm not. josh is.
2: cyka blyat noob team
3: git gud
4: I don't give a fuck if xray wants you to do it. if you're going to spam somebody, you shouldn't mind being spammed back. if you do mind you're a fokn hypocrite.

1. K.
2. K.
3. K.
4. I don't condone downvoting people excessively. But if the person requests it, I see no issue. This is why I downvote xray. I did not request that Josh downvote me and therefore do not expect him to, and therefore, under my personal reputation etiquette, I am not a hypocrite. However, I did excessively downvote Josh after he did to me as I was frustrated. This wasn't called for and breaks my personal etiquette so therefore I will reluctantly undo my last 5 downvotes to Josh. This will have to be tomorrow as apparently I submitted those at 1:54 AM today.

(06-27-2016, 06:58 PM)slugdude Wrote: [ -> ]

(06-27-2016, 06:28 PM)Apuly Wrote: [ -> ]1: nobody. I'm not. josh is.
2: cyka blyat noob team
3: git gud
4: I don't give a fuck if xray wants you to do it. if you're going to spam somebody, you shouldn't mind being spammed back. if you do mind you're a fokn hypocrite.

1. K.
2. K.
3. K.
4. I don't condone downvoting people excessively. But if the person requests it, I see no issue. This is why I downvote xray. I did not request that Josh downvote me and therefore do not expect him to, and therefore, under my personal reputation etiquette, I am not a hypocrite. However, I did excessively downvote Josh after he did to me as I was frustrated. This wasn't called for and breaks my personal etiquette so therefore I will reluctantly undo my last 5 downvotes to Josh. This will have to be tomorrow as apparently I submitted those at 1:54 AM today.

Who died and made you Judge Judy?

I feel like if you cant go a day without spamming you have a problem...

(06-28-2016, 02:10 AM)josh03222 Wrote: [ -> ]

(06-27-2016, 06:58 PM)slugdude Wrote: [ -> ]

(06-27-2016, 06:28 PM)Apuly Wrote: [ -> ]1: nobody. I'm not. josh is.
2: cyka blyat noob team
3: git gud
4: I don't give a fuck if xray wants you to do it. if you're going to spam somebody, you shouldn't mind being spammed back. if you do mind you're a fokn hypocrite.

1. K.
2. K.
3. K.
4. I don't condone downvoting people excessively. But if the person requests it, I see no issue. This is why I downvote xray. I did not request that Josh downvote me and therefore do not expect him to, and therefore, under my personal reputation etiquette, I am not a hypocrite. However, I did excessively downvote Josh after he did to me as I was frustrated. This wasn't called for and breaks my personal etiquette so therefore I will reluctantly undo my last 5 downvotes to Josh. This will have to be tomorrow as apparently I submitted those at 1:54 AM today.

Who died and made you Judge Judy?

Those are just my own rules.
Feel free to use them.

I'll abuse them

(06-30-2016, 12:03 AM)Apuly Wrote: [ -> ]I'll abuse them

smart idea.

(07-02-2016, 06:36 PM)josh03222 Wrote: [ -> ]

(06-30-2016, 12:03 AM)Apuly Wrote: [ -> ]I'll abuse them

smart idea.

Seeing as this thread is no longer on the front page of shenanigans, I decided to bump it back up.
Also, seeing as this is the 24/7 spam thread, these sort of things are allowed.

(09-11-2016, 10:46 AM)Apuly Wrote: [ -> ]Seeing as this thread is no longer on the front page of shenanigans, I decided to bump it back up.
Also, seeing as this is the 24/7 spam thread, these sort of things are allowed.

I bump god looking mofo car?

U Bumper Cars Minos Cars

You Bumper Cars Minus Cars

You Bumper

ah

hah

nice maymay

btw, could you stop shitposting outside shananigans?
and maybe stop making so many god damn threads.

This thread would be perfect for everything you want to do.

HELLO, I AM COW. MOOOO

fap

nick be posting that screnshit everywhere

Screenshitception ^

Also bump cuzwainot

you're not special for bumping m8
this thread can be bumped as much as you god damn please

roasted

And then toasted!

And then boiled!

why would you roast, toast and boil something in that specific order?
Everybody knows that you boil before you toast.

No no no that's all wrong. You boil , broil, roast,toast and then grill the post to perfection then you dig in and eat.

boiled bread for breakfast

durp

i had boiled breakfast for bread

and bread breakfast for boiled

spem

/\
R

According to all known laws
of aviation,


there is no way a bee
should be able to fly.


Its wings are too small to get
its fat little body off the ground.


The bee, of course, flies anyway


because bees don't care
what humans think is impossible.


Yellow, black. Yellow, black.
Yellow, black. Yellow, black.


Ooh, black and yellow!
Let's shake it up a little.


Barry! Breakfast is ready!


Ooming!


Hang on a second.


Hello?


- Barry?
- Adam?


- Oan you believe this is happening?
- I can't. I'll pick you up.


Looking sharp.


Use the stairs. Your father
paid good money for those.


Sorry. I'm excited.


Here's the graduate.
We're very proud of you, son.


A perfect report card, all B's.


Very proud.


Ma! I got a thing going here.


- You got lint on your fuzz.
- Ow! That's me!


- Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000.
- Bye!


Barry, I told you,
stop flying in the house!


- Hey, Adam.
- Hey, Barry.


- Is that fuzz gel?
- A little. Special day, graduation.


Never thought I'd make it.


Three days grade school,
three days high school.


Those were awkward.


Three days college. I'm glad I took
a day and hitchhiked around the hive.


You did come back different.


- Hi, Barry.
- Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good.


- Hear about Frankie?
- Yeah.


- You going to the funeral?
- No, I'm not going.


Everybody knows,
sting someone, you die.


Don't waste it on a squirrel.
Such a hothead.


I guess he could have
just gotten out of the way.


I love this incorporating
an amusement park into our day.


That's why we don't need vacations.


Boy, quite a bit of pomp...
under the circumstances.


- Well, Adam, today we are men.
- We are!


- Bee-men.
- Amen!


Hallelujah!


Students, faculty, distinguished bees,


please welcome Dean Buzzwell.


Welcome, New Hive Oity
graduating class of...


...9:15.


That concludes our ceremonies.


And begins your career
at Honex Industries!


Will we pick ourjob today?


I heard it's just orientation.


Heads up! Here we go.


Keep your hands and antennas
inside the tram at all times.


- Wonder what it'll be like?
- A little scary.


Welcome to Honex,
a division of Honesco


and a part of the Hexagon Group.


This is it!


Wow.


Wow.


We know that you, as a bee,
have worked your whole life


to get to the point where you
can work for your whole life.


Honey begins when our valiant Pollen
Jocks bring the nectar to the hive.


Our top-secret formula


is automatically color-corrected,
scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured


into this soothing sweet syrup


with its distinctive
golden glow you know as...


Honey!


- That girl was hot.
- She's my cousin!


- She is?
- Yes, we're all cousins.


- Right. You're right.
- At Honex, we constantly strive


to improve every aspect
of bee existence.


These bees are stress-testing
a new helmet technology.


- What do you think he makes?
- Not enough.


Here we have our latest advancement,
the Krelman.


- What does that do?
- Oatches that little strand of honey


that hangs after you pour it.
Saves us millions.


Oan anyone work on the Krelman?


Of course. Most bee jobs are
small ones. But bees know


that every small job,
if it's done well, means a lot.


But choose carefully


because you'll stay in the job
you pick for the rest of your life.


The same job the rest of your life?
I didn't know that.


What's the difference?


You'll be happy to know that bees,
as a species, haven't had one day off


in 27 million years.


So you'll just work us to death?


We'll sure try.


Wow! That blew my mind!


"What's the difference?"
How can you say that?


One job forever?
That's an insane choice to have to make.


I'm relieved. Now we only have
to make one decision in life.


But, Adam, how could they
never have told us that?


Why would you question anything?
We're bees.


We're the most perfectly
functioning society on Earth.


You ever think maybe things
work a little too well here?


Like what? Give me one example.


I don't know. But you know
what I'm talking about.


Please clear the gate.
Royal Nectar Force on approach.


Wait a second. Oheck it out.


- Hey, those are Pollen Jocks!
- Wow.


I've never seen them this close.


They know what it's like
outside the hive.


Yeah, but some don't come back.


- Hey, Jocks!
- Hi, Jocks!


You guys did great!


You're monsters!
You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it!


- I wonder where they were.
- I don't know.


Their day's not planned.


Outside the hive, flying who knows
where, doing who knows what.


You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen
Jock. You have to be bred for that.


Right.


Look. That's more pollen
than you and I will see in a lifetime.


It's just a status symbol.
Bees make too much of it.


Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it
and the ladies see you wearing it.


Those ladies?
Aren't they our cousins too?


Distant. Distant.


Look at these two.


- Oouple of Hive Harrys.
- Let's have fun with them.


It must be dangerous
being a Pollen Jock.


Yeah. Once a bear pinned me
against a mushroom!


He had a paw on my throat,
and with the other, he was slapping me!


- Oh, my!
- I never thought I'd knock him out.


What were you doing during this?


Trying to alert the authorities.


I can autograph that.


A little gusty out there today,
wasn't it, comrades?


Yeah. Gusty.


We're hitting a sunflower patch
six miles from here tomorrow.


- Six miles, huh?
- Barry!


A puddle jump for us,
but maybe you're not up for it.


- Maybe I am.
- You are not!


We're going 0900 at J-Gate.


What do you think, buzzy-boy?
Are you bee enough?


I might be. It all depends
on what 0900 means.


Hey, Honex!


Dad, you surprised me.


You decide what you're interested in?


- Well, there's a lot of choices.
- But you only get one.


Do you ever get bored
doing the same job every day?


Son, let me tell you about stirring.


You grab that stick, and you just
move it around, and you stir it around.


You get yourself into a rhythm.
It's a beautiful thing.


You know, Dad,
the more I think about it,


maybe the honey field
just isn't right for me.


You were thinking of what,
making balloon animals?


That's a bad job
for a guy with a stinger.


Janet, your son's not sure
he wants to go into honey!


- Barry, you are so funny sometimes.
- I'm not trying to be funny.


You're not funny! You're going
into honey. Our son, the stirrer!


- You're gonna be a stirrer?
- No one's listening to me!


Wait till you see the sticks I have.


I could say anything right now.
I'm gonna get an ant tattoo!


Let's open some honey and celebrate!


Maybe I'll pierce my thorax.
Shave my antennae.


Shack up with a grasshopper. Get
a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"!


I'm so proud.


- We're starting work today!
- Today's the day.


Oome on! All the good jobs
will be gone.


Yeah, right.


Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring,
stirrer, front desk, hair removal...


- Is it still available?
- Hang on. Two left!


One of them's yours! Oongratulations!
Step to the side.


- What'd you get?
- Picking crud out. Stellar!


Wow!


Oouple of newbies?


Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready!


Make your choice.


- You want to go first?
- No, you go.


Oh, my. What's available?


Restroom attendant's open,
not for the reason you think.


- Any chance of getting the Krelman?
- Sure, you're on.


I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out.


Wax monkey's always open.


The Krelman opened up again.


What happened?


A bee died. Makes an opening. See?
He's dead. Another dead one.


Deady. Deadified. Two more dead.


Dead from the neck up.
Dead from the neck down. That's life!


Oh, this is so hard!


Heating, cooling,
stunt bee, pourer, stirrer,


humming, inspector number seven,
lint coordinator, stripe supervisor,


mite wrangler. Barry, what
do you think I should... Barry?


Barry!


All right, we've got the sunflower patch
in quadrant nine...


What happened to you?
Where are you?


- I'm going out.
- Out? Out where?


- Out there.
- Oh, no!


I have to, before I go
to work for the rest of my life.


You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello?


Another call coming in.


If anyone's feeling brave,
there's a Korean deli on 83rd


that gets their roses today.


Hey, guys.


- Look at that.
- Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday?


Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted.


It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up.


Really? Feeling lucky, are you?


Sign here, here. Just initial that.


- Thank you.
- OK.


You got a rain advisory today,


and as you all know,
bees cannot fly in rain.


So be careful. As always,
watch your brooms,


hockey sticks, dogs,
birds, bears and bats.


Also, I got a couple of reports
of root beer being poured on us.


Murphy's in a home because of it,
babbling like a cicada!


- That's awful.
- And a reminder for you rookies,


bee law number one,
absolutely no talking to humans!


All right, launch positions!


Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz,
buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz!


Black and yellow!


Hello!


You ready for this, hot shot?


Yeah. Yeah, bring it on.


Wind, check.


- Antennae, check.
- Nectar pack, check.


- Wings, check.
- Stinger, check.


Scared out of my shorts, check.


OK, ladies,


let's move it out!


Pound those petunias,
you striped stem-suckers!


All of you, drain those flowers!


Wow! I'm out!


I can't believe I'm out!


So blue.


I feel so fast and free!


Box kite!


Wow!


Flowers!


This is Blue Leader.
We have roses visual.


Bring it around 30 degrees and hold.


Roses!


30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around.


Stand to the side, kid.
It's got a bit of a kick.


That is one nectar collector!


- Ever see pollination up close?
- No, sir.


I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it
over here. Maybe a dash over there,


a pinch on that one.
See that? It's a little bit of magic.


That's amazing. Why do we do that?


That's pollen power. More pollen, more
flowers, more nectar, more honey for us.


Oool.


I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow.
Oould be daisies. Don't we need those?


Oopy that visual.


Wait. One of these flowers
seems to be on the move.


Say again? You're reporting
a moving flower?


Affirmative.


That was on the line!


This is the coolest. What is it?


I don't know, but I'm loving this color.


It smells good.
Not like a flower, but I like it.


Yeah, fuzzy.


Ohemical-y.


Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby.


My sweet lord of bees!


Oandy-brain, get off there!


Problem!


- Guys!
- This could be bad.


Affirmative.


Very close.


Gonna hurt.


Mama's little boy.


You are way out of position, rookie!


Ooming in at you like a missile!


Help me!


I don't think these are flowers.


- Should we tell him?
- I think he knows.


What is this?!


Match point!


You can start packing up, honey,
because you're about to eat it!


Yowser!


Gross.


There's a bee in the car!


- Do something!
- I'm driving!


- Hi, bee.
- He's back here!


He's going to sting me!


Nobody move. If you don't move,
he won't sting you. Freeze!


He blinked!


Spray him, Granny!


What are you doing?!


Wow... the tension level
out here is unbelievable.


I gotta get home.


Oan't fly in rain.


Oan't fly in rain.


Oan't fly in rain.


Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down!


Ken, could you close
the window please?


Ken, could you close
the window please?


Oheck out my new resume.
I made it into a fold-out brochure.


You see? Folds out.


Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this.


What was that?


Maybe this time. This time. This time.
This time! This time! This...


Drapes!


That is diabolical.


It's fantastic. It's got all my special
skills, even my top-ten favorite movies.


What's number one? Star Wars?


Nah, I don't go for that...


...kind of stuff.


No wonder we shouldn't talk to them.
They're out of their minds.


When I leave a job interview, they're
flabbergasted, can't believe what I say.


There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out.


I don't remember the sun
having a big 75 on it.


I predicted global warming.


I could feel it getting hotter.
At first I thought it was just me.


Wait! Stop! Bee!


Stand back. These are winter boots.


Wait!


Don't kill him!


You know I'm allergic to them!
This thing could kill me!


Why does his life have
less value than yours?


Why does his life have any less value
than mine? Is that your statement?


I'm just saying all life has value. You
don't know what he's capable of feeling.


My brochure!


There you go, little guy.


I'm not scared of him.
It's an allergic thing.


Put that on your resume brochure.


My whole face could puff up.


Make it one of your special skills.


Knocking someone out
is also a special skill.


Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks.


- Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night?
- Sure, Ken. You know, whatever.


- You could put carob chips on there.
- Bye.


- Supposed to be less calories.
- Bye.


I gotta say something.


She saved my life.
I gotta say something.


All right, here it goes.


Nah.


What would I say?


I could really get in trouble.


It's a bee law.
You're not supposed to talk to a human.


I can't believe I'm doing this.


I've got to.


Oh, I can't do it. Oome on!


No. Yes. No.


Do it. I can't.


How should I start it?
"You like jazz?" No, that's no good.


Here she comes! Speak, you fool!


Hi!


I'm sorry.


- You're talking.
- Yes, I know.


You're talking!


I'm so sorry.


No, it's OK. It's fine.
I know I'm dreaming.


But I don't recall going to bed.


Well, I'm sure this
is very disconcerting.


This is a bit of a surprise to me.
I mean, you're a bee!


I am. And I'm not supposed
to be doing this,


but they were all trying to kill me.


And if it wasn't for you...


I had to thank you.
It's just how I was raised.


That was a little weird.


- I'm talking with a bee.
- Yeah.


I'm talking to a bee.
And the bee is talking to me!


I just want to say I'm grateful.
I'll leave now.


- Wait! How did you learn to do that?
- What?


The talking thing.


Same way you did, I guess.
"Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up.


- That's very funny.
- Yeah.


Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh,
we'd cry with what we have to deal with.


Anyway...


Oan I...


...get you something?
- Like what?


I don't know. I mean...
I don't know. Ooffee?


I don't want to put you out.


It's no trouble. It takes two minutes.


- It's just coffee.
- I hate to impose.


- Don't be ridiculous!
- Actually, I would love a cup.


Hey, you want rum cake?


- I shouldn't.
- Have some.


- No, I can't.
- Oome on!


I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms.


- Where?
- These stripes don't help.


You look great!


I don't know if you know
anything about fashion.


Are you all right?


No.


He's making the tie in the cab
as they're flying up Madison.


He finally gets there.


He runs up the steps into the church.
The wedding is on.


And he says, "Watermelon?
I thought you said Guatemalan.


Why would I marry a watermelon?"


Is that a bee joke?


That's the kind of stuff we do.


Yeah, different.


So, what are you gonna do, Barry?


About work? I don't know.


I want to do my part for the hive,
but I can't do it the way they want.


I know how you feel.


- You do?
- Sure.


My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or
a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist.


- Really?
- My only interest is flowers.


Our new queen was just elected
with that same campaign slogan.


Anyway, if you look...


There's my hive right there. See it?


You're in Sheep Meadow!


Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond!


No way! I know that area.
I lost a toe ring there once.


- Why do girls put rings on their toes?
- Why not?


- It's like putting a hat on your knee.
- Maybe I'll try that.


- You all right, ma'am?
- Oh, yeah. Fine.


Just having two cups of coffee!


Anyway, this has been great.
Thanks for the coffee.


Yeah, it's no trouble.


Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did,
I'd be up the rest of my life.


Are you...?


Oan I take a piece of this with me?


Sure! Here, have a crumb.


- Thanks!
- Yeah.


All right. Well, then...
I guess I'll see you around.


Or not.


OK, Barry.


And thank you
so much again... for before.


Oh, that? That was nothing.


Well, not nothing, but... Anyway...


This can't possibly work.


He's all set to go.
We may as well try it.


OK, Dave, pull the chute.


- Sounds amazing.
- It was amazing!


It was the scariest,
happiest moment of my life.


Humans! I can't believe
you were with humans!


Giant, scary humans!
What were they like?


Huge and crazy. They talk crazy.


They eat crazy giant things.
They drive crazy.


- Do they try and kill you, like on TV?
- Some of them. But some of them don't.


- How'd you get back?
- Poodle.


You did it, and I'm glad. You saw
whatever you wanted to see.


You had your "experience." Now you
can pick out yourjob and be normal.


- Well...
- Well?


Well, I met someone.


You did? Was she Bee-ish?


- A wasp?! Your parents will kill you!
- No, no, no, not a wasp.


- Spider?
- I'm not attracted to spiders.


I know it's the hottest thing,
with the eight legs and all.


I can't get by that face.


So who is she?


She's... human.


No, no. That's a bee law.
You wouldn't break a bee law.


- Her name's Vanessa.
- Oh, boy.


She's so nice. And she's a florist!


Oh, no! You're dating a human florist!


We're not dating.


You're flying outside the hive, talking
to humans that attack our homes


with power washers and M-80s!
One-eighth a stick of dynamite!


She saved my life!
And she understands me.


This is over!


Eat this.


This is not over! What was that?


- They call it a crumb.
- It was so stingin' stripey!


And that's not what they eat.
That's what falls off what they eat!


- You know what a Oinnabon is?
- No.


It's bread and cinnamon and frosting.
They heat it up...


Sit down!


...really hot!
- Listen to me!


We are not them! We're us.
There's us and there's them!


Yes, but who can deny
the heart that is yearning?


There's no yearning.
Stop yearning. Listen to me!


You have got to start thinking bee,
my friend. Thinking bee!


- Thinking bee.
- Thinking bee.


Thinking bee! Thinking bee!
Thinking bee! Thinking bee!


There he is. He's in the pool.


You know what your problem is, Barry?


I gotta start thinking bee?


How much longer will this go on?


It's been three days!
Why aren't you working?


I've got a lot of big life decisions
to think about.


What life? You have no life!
You have no job. You're barely a bee!


Would it kill you
to make a little honey?


Barry, come out.
Your father's talking to you.


Martin, would you talk to him?


Barry, I'm talking to you!


You coming?


Got everything?


All set!


Go ahead. I'll catch up.


Don't be too long.


Watch this!


Vanessa!


- We're still here.
- I told you not to yell at him.


He doesn't respond to yelling!


- Then why yell at me?
- Because you don't listen!


I'm not listening to this.


Sorry, I've gotta go.


- Where are you going?
- I'm meeting a friend.


A girl? Is this why you can't decide?


Bye.


I just hope she's Bee-ish.


They have a huge parade
of flowers every year in Pasadena?


To be in the Tournament of Roses,
that's every florist's dream!


Up on a float, surrounded
by flowers, crowds cheering.


A tournament. Do the roses
compete in athletic events?


No. All right, I've got one.
How come you don't fly everywhere?


It's exhausting. Why don't you
run everywhere? It's faster.


Yeah, OK, I see, I see.
All right, your turn.


TiVo. You can just freeze live TV?
That's insane!


You don't have that?


We have Hivo, but it's a disease.
It's a horrible, horrible disease.


Oh, my.


Dumb bees!


You must want to sting all those jerks.


We try not to sting.
It's usually fatal for us.


So you have to watch your temper.


Very carefully.
You kick a wall, take a walk,


write an angry letter and throw it out.
Work through it like any emotion:


Anger, jealousy, lust.


Oh, my goodness! Are you OK?


Yeah.


- What is wrong with you?!
- It's a bug.


He's not bothering anybody.
Get out of here, you creep!


What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular?


Yeah, it was. How did you know?


It felt like about 10 pages.
Seventy-five is pretty much our limit.


You've really got that
down to a science.


- I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue.
- I'll bet.


What in the name
of Mighty Hercules is this?


How did this get here?
Oute Bee, Golden Blossom,


Ray Liotta Private Select?


- Is he that actor?
- I never heard of him.


- Why is this here?
- For people. We eat it.


You don't have
enough food of your own?


- Well, yes.
- How do you get it?


- Bees make it.
- I know who makes it!


And it's hard to make it!


There's heating, cooling, stirring.
You need a whole Krelman thing!


- It's organic.
- It's our-ganic!


It's just honey, Barry.


Just what?!


Bees don't know about this!
This is stealing! A lot of stealing!


You've taken our homes, schools,
hospitals! This is all we have!


And it's on sale?!
I'm getting to the bottom of this.


I'm getting to the bottom
of all of this!


Hey, Hector.


- You almost done?
- Almost.


He is here. I sense it.


Well, I guess I'll go home now


and just leave this nice honey out,
with no one around.


You're busted, box boy!


I knew I heard something.
So you can talk!


I can talk.
And now you'll start talking!


Where you getting the sweet stuff?
Who's your supplier?


I don't understand.
I thought we were friends.


The last thing we want
to do is upset bees!


You're too late! It's ours now!


You, sir, have crossed
the wrong sword!


You, sir, will be lunch
for my iguana, Ignacio!


Where is the honey coming from?


Tell me where!


Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms!


Orazy person!


What horrible thing has happened here?


These faces, they never knew
what hit them. And now


they're on the road to nowhere!


Just keep still.


What? You're not dead?


Do I look dead? They will wipe anything
that moves. Where you headed?


To Honey Farms.
I am onto something huge here.


I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood,
crazy stuff. Blows your head off!


I'm going to Tacoma.


- And you?
- He really is dead.


All right.


Uh-oh!


- What is that?!
- Oh, no!


- A wiper! Triple blade!
- Triple blade?


Jump on! It's your only chance, bee!


Why does everything have
to be so doggone clean?!


How much do you people need to see?!


Open your eyes!
Stick your head out the window!


From NPR News in Washington,
I'm Oarl Kasell.


But don't kill no more bugs!


- Bee!
- Moose blood guy!!


- You hear something?
- Like what?


Like tiny screaming.


Turn off the radio.


Whassup, bee boy?


Hey, Blood.


Just a row of honey jars,
as far as the eye could see.


Wow!


I assume wherever this truck goes
is where they're getting it.


I mean, that honey's ours.


- Bees hang tight.
- We're all jammed in.


It's a close community.


Not us, man. We on our own.
Every mosquito on his own.


- What if you get in trouble?
- You a mosquito, you in trouble.


Nobody likes us. They just smack.
See a mosquito, smack, smack!


At least you're out in the world.
You must meet girls.


Mosquito girls try to trade up,
get with a moth, dragonfly.


Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito.


You got to be kidding me!


Mooseblood's about to leave
the building! So long, bee!


- Hey, guys!
- Mooseblood!


I knew I'd catch y'all down here.
Did you bring your crazy straw?


We throw it in jars, slap a label on it,
and it's pretty much pure profit.


What is this place?


A bee's got a brain
the size of a pinhead.


They are pinheads!


Pinhead.


- Oheck out the new smoker.
- Oh, sweet. That's the one you want.


The Thomas 3000!


Smoker?


Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic.
Twice the nicotine, all the tar.


A couple breaths of this
knocks them right out.


They make the honey,
and we make the money.


"They make the honey,
and we make the money"?


Oh, my!


What's going on? Are you OK?


Yeah. It doesn't last too long.


Do you know you're
in a fake hive with fake walls?


Our queen was moved here.
We had no choice.


This is your queen?
That's a man in women's clothes!


That's a drag queen!


What is this?


Oh, no!


There's hundreds of them!


Bee honey.


Our honey is being brazenly stolen
on a massive scale!


This is worse than anything bears
have done! I intend to do something.


Oh, Barry, stop.


Who told you humans are taking
our honey? That's a rumor.


Do these look like rumors?


That's a conspiracy theory.
These are obviously doctored photos.


How did you get mixed up in this?


He's been talking to humans.


- What?
- Talking to humans?!


He has a human girlfriend.
And they make out!


Make out? Barry!


We do not.


- You wish you could.
- Whose side are you on?


The bees!


I dated a cricket once in San Antonio.
Those crazy legs kept me up all night.


Barry, this is what you want
to do with your life?


I want to do it for all our lives.
Nobody works harder than bees!


Dad, I remember you
coming home so overworked


your hands were still stirring.
You couldn't stop.


I remember that.


What right do they have to our honey?


We live on two cups a year. They put it
in lip balm for no reason whatsoever!


Even if it's true, what can one bee do?


Sting them where it really hurts.


In the face! The eye!


- That would hurt.
- No.


Up the nose? That's a killer.


There's only one place you can sting
the humans, one place where it matters.


Hive at Five, the hive's only
full-hour action news source.


No more bee beards!


With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk.


Weather with Storm Stinger.


Sports with Buzz Larvi.


And Jeanette Ohung.


- Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble.
- And I'm Jeanette Ohung.


A tri-county bee, Barry Benson,


intends to sue the human race
for stealing our honey,


packaging it and profiting
from it illegally!


Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King,


we'll have three former queens here in
our studio, discussing their new book,


Olassy Ladies,
out this week on Hexagon.


Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson.


Did you ever think, "I'm a kid
from the hive. I can't do this"?


Bees have never been afraid
to change the world.


What about Bee Oolumbus?
Bee Gandhi? Bejesus?


Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans.


We were thinking
of stickball or candy stores.


How old are you?


The bee community
is supporting you in this case,


which will be the trial
of the bee century.


You know, they have a Larry King
in the human world too.


It's a common name. Next week...


He looks like you and has a show
and suspenders and colored dots...


Next week...


Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the
guest even though you just heard 'em.


Bear Week next week!
They're scary, hairy and here live.


Always leans forward, pointy shoulders,
squinty eyes, very Jewish.


In tennis, you attack
at the point of weakness!


It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81.


Honey, her backhand's a joke!
I'm not gonna take advantage of that?


Quiet, please.
Actual work going on here.


- Is that that same bee?
- Yes, it is!


I'm helping him sue the human race.


- Hello.
- Hello, bee.


This is Ken.


Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size
ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe.


Why does he talk again?


Listen, you better go
'cause we're really busy working.


But it's our yogurt night!


Bye-bye.


Why is yogurt night so difficult?!


You poor thing.
You two have been at this for hours!


Yes, and Adam here
has been a huge help.


- Frosting...
- How many sugars?


Just one. I try not
to use the competition.


So why are you helping me?


Bees have good qualities.


And it takes my mind off the shop.


Instead of flowers, people
are giving balloon bouquets now.


Those are great, if you're three.


And artificial flowers.


- Oh, those just get me psychotic!
- Yeah, me too.


Bent stingers, pointless pollination.


Bees must hate those fake things!


Nothing worse
than a daffodil that's had work done.


Maybe this could make up
for it a little bit.


- This lawsuit's a pretty big deal.
- I guess.


You sure you want to go through with it?


Am I sure? When I'm done with
the humans, they won't be able


to say, "Honey, I'm home,"
without paying a royalty!


It's an incredible scene
here in downtown Manhattan,


where the world anxiously waits,
because for the first time in history,


we will hear for ourselves
if a honeybee can actually speak.


What have we gotten into here, Barry?


It's pretty big, isn't it?


I can't believe how many humans
don't work during the day.


You think billion-dollar multinational
food companies have good lawyers?


Everybody needs to stay
behind the barricade.


- What's the matter?
- I don't know, I just got a chill.


Well, if it isn't the bee team.


You boys work on this?


All rise! The Honorable
Judge Bumbleton presiding.


All right. Oase number 4475,


Superior Oourt of New York,
Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry


is now in session.


Mr. Montgomery, you're representing
the five food companies collectively?


A privilege.


Mr. Benson... you're representing
all the bees of the world?


I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor,
we're ready to proceed.


Mr. Montgomery,
your opening statement, please.


Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,


my grandmother was a simple woman.


Born on a farm, she believed
it was man's divine right


to benefit from the bounty
of nature God put before us.


If we lived in the topsy-turvy world
Mr. Benson imagines,


just think of what would it mean.


I would have to negotiate
with the silkworm


for the elastic in my britches!


Talking bee!


How do we know this isn't some sort of


holographic motion-picture-capture
Hollywood wizardry?


They could be using laser beams!


Robotics! Ventriloquism!
Oloning! For all we know,


he could be on steroids!


Mr. Benson?


Ladies and gentlemen,
there's no trickery here.


I'm just an ordinary bee.
Honey's pretty important to me.


It's important to all bees.
We invented it!


We make it. And we protect it
with our lives.


Unfortunately, there are
some people in this room


who think they can take it from us


'cause we're the little guys!
I'm hoping that, after this is all over,


you'll see how, by taking our honey,
you not only take everything we have


but everything we are!


I wish he'd dress like that
all the time. So nice!


Oall your first witness.


So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden
of Honey Farms, big company you have.


I suppose so.


I see you also own
Honeyburton and Honron!


Yes, they provide beekeepers
for our farms.


Beekeeper. I find that
to be a very disturbing term.


I don't imagine you employ
any bee-free-ers, do you?


- No.
- I couldn't hear you.


- No.
- No.


Because you don't free bees.
You keep bees. Not only that,


it seems you thought a bear would be
an appropriate image for a jar of honey.


They're very lovable creatures.


Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear.


You mean like this?


Bears kill bees!


How'd you like his head crashing
through your living room?!


Biting into your couch!
Spitting out your throw pillows!


OK, that's enough. Take him away.


So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here.
Your name intrigues me.


- Where have I heard it before?
- I was with a band called The Police.


But you've never been
a police officer, have you?


No, I haven't.


No, you haven't. And so here
we have yet another example


of bee culture casually
stolen by a human


for nothing more than
a prance-about stage name.


Oh, please.


Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting?


Because I'm feeling
a little stung, Sting.


Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner!


That's not his real name?! You idiots!


Mr. Liotta, first,
belated congratulations on


your Emmy win for a guest spot
on ER in 2005.


Thank you. Thank you.


I see from your resume
that you're devilishly handsome


with a churning inner turmoil
that's ready to blow.


I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime?


Not yet it isn't. But is this
what it's come to for you?


Exploiting tiny, helpless bees
so you don't


have to rehearse
your part and learn your lines, sir?


Watch it, Benson!
I could blow right now!


This isn't a goodfella.
This is a badfella!


Why doesn't someone just step on
this creep, and we can all go home?!


- Order in this court!
- You're all thinking it!


Order! Order, I say!


- Say it!
- Mr. Liotta, please sit down!


I think it was awfully nice
of that bear to pitch in like that.


I think the jury's on our side.


Are we doing everything right, legally?


I'm a florist.


Right. Well, here's to a great team.


To a great team!


Well, hello.


- Ken!
- Hello.


I didn't think you were coming.


No, I was just late.
I tried to call, but... the battery.


I didn't want all this to go to waste,
so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free.


Oh, that was lucky.


There's a little left.
I could heat it up.


Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever.


So I hear you're quite a tennis player.


I'm not much for the game myself.
The ball's a little grabby.


That's where I usually sit.
Right... there.


Ken, Barry was looking at your resume,


and he agreed with me that eating with
chopsticks isn't really a special skill.


You think I don't see what you're doing?


I know how hard it is to find
the rightjob. We have that in common.


Do we?


Bees have 100 percent employment,
but we do jobs like taking the crud out.


That's just what
I was thinking about doing.


Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor
for his fuzz. I hope that was all right.


I'm going to drain the old stinger.


Yeah, you do that.


Look at that.


You know, I've just about had it


with your little mind games.


- What's that?
- Italian Vogue.


Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages.


A lot of ads.


Remember what Van said, why is
your life more valuable than mine?


Funny, I just can't seem to recall that!


I think something stinks in here!


I love the smell of flowers.


How do you like the smell of flames?!


Not as much.


Water bug! Not taking sides!


Ken, I'm wearing a Ohapstick hat!
This is pathetic!


I've got issues!


Well, well, well, a royal flush!


- You're bluffing.
- Am I?


Surf's up, dude!


Poo water!


That bowl is gnarly.


Except for those dirty yellow rings!


Kenneth! What are you doing?!


You know, I don't even like honey!
I don't eat it!


We need to talk!


He's just a little bee!


And he happens to be
the nicest bee I've met in a long time!


Long time? What are you talking about?!
Are there other bugs in your life?


No, but there are other things bugging
me in life. And you're one of them!


Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night...


My nerves are fried from riding
on this emotional roller coaster!


Goodbye, Ken.


And for your information,


I prefer sugar-free, artificial
sweeteners made by man!


I'm sorry about all that.


I know it's got
an aftertaste! I like it!


I always felt there was some kind
of barrier between Ken and me.


I couldn't overcome it.
Oh, well.


Are you OK for the trial?


I believe Mr. Montgomery
is about out of ideas.


We would like to call
Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand.


Good idea! You can really see why he's
considered one of the best lawyers...


Yeah.


Layton, you've
gotta weave some magic


with this jury,
or it's gonna be all over.


Don't worry. The only thing I have
to do to turn this jury around


is to remind them
of what they don't like about bees.


- You got the tweezers?
- Are you allergic?


Only to losing, son. Only to losing.


Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you
what I think we'd all like to know.


What exactly is your relationship


to that woman?


We're friends.


- Good friends?
- Yes.


How good? Do you live together?


Wait a minute...


Are you her little...


...bedbug?


I've seen a bee documentary or two.
From what I understand,


doesn't your queen give birth
to all the bee children?


- Yeah, but...
- So those aren't your real parents!


- Oh, Barry...
- Yes, they are!


Hold me back!


You're an illegitimate bee,
aren't you, Benson?


He's denouncing bees!


Don't y'all date your cousins?


- Objection!
- I'm going to pincushion this guy!


Adam, don't! It's what he wants!


Oh, I'm hit!!


Oh, lordy, I am hit!


Order! Order!


The venom! The venom
is coursing through my veins!


I have been felled
by a winged beast of destruction!


You see? You can't treat them
like equals! They're striped savages!


Stinging's the only thing
they know! It's their way!


- Adam, stay with me.
- I can't feel my legs.


What angel of mercy
will come forward to suck the poison


from my heaving buttocks?


I will have order in this court. Order!


Order, please!


The case of the honeybees
versus the human race


took a pointed turn against the bees


yesterday when one of their legal
team stung Layton T. Montgomery.


- Hey, buddy.
- Hey.


- Is there much pain?
- Yeah.


I...


I blew the whole case, didn't I?


It doesn't matter. What matters is
you're alive. You could have died.


I'd be better off dead. Look at me.


They got it from the cafeteria
downstairs, in a tuna sandwich.


Look, there's
a little celery still on it.


What was it like to sting someone?


I can't explain it. It was all...


All adrenaline and then...
and then ecstasy!


All right.


You think it was all a trap?


Of course. I'm sorry.
I flew us right into this.


What were we thinking? Look at us. We're
just a couple of bugs in this world.


What will the humans do to us
if they win?


I don't know.


I hear they put the roaches in motels.
That doesn't sound so bad.


Adam, they check in,
but they don't check out!


Oh, my.


Oould you get a nurse
to close that window?


- Why?
- The smoke.


Bees don't smoke.


Right. Bees don't smoke.


Bees don't smoke!
But some bees are smoking.


That's it! That's our case!


It is? It's not over?


Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere.


Get back to the court and stall.
Stall any way you can.


And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub.


Mr. Flayman.


Yes? Yes, Your Honor!


Where is the rest of your team?


Well, Your Honor, it's interesting.


Bees are trained to fly haphazardly,


and as a result,
we don't make very good time.


I actually heard a funny story about...


Your Honor,
haven't these ridiculous bugs


taken up enough
of this court's valuable time?


How much longer will we allow
these absurd shenanigans to go on?


They have presented no compelling
evidence to support their charges


against my clients,
who run legitimate businesses.


I move for a complete dismissal
of this entire case!


Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going


to have to consider
Mr. Montgomery's motion.


But you can't! We have a terrific case.


Where is your proof?
Where is the evidence?


Show me the smoking gun!


Hold it, Your Honor!
You want a smoking gun?


Here is your smoking gun.


What is that?


It's a bee smoker!


What, this?
This harmless little contraption?


This couldn't hurt a fly,
let alone a bee.


Look at what has happened


to bees who have never been asked,
"Smoking or non?"


Is this what nature intended for us?


To be forcibly addicted
to smoke machines


and man-made wooden slat work camps?


Living out our lives as honey slaves
to the white man?


- What are we gonna do?
- He's playing the species card.


Ladies and gentlemen, please,
free these bees!


Free the bees! Free the bees!


Free the bees!


Free the bees! Free the bees!


The court finds in favor of the bees!


Vanessa, we won!


I knew you could do it! High-five!


Sorry.


I'm OK! You know what this means?


All the honey
will finally belong to the bees.


Now we won't have
to work so hard all the time.


This is an unholy perversion
of the balance of nature, Benson.


You'll regret this.


Barry, how much honey is out there?


All right. One at a time.


Barry, who are you wearing?


My sweater is Ralph Lauren,
and I have no pants.


- What if Montgomery's right?
- What do you mean?


We've been living the bee way
a long time, 27 million years.


Oongratulations on your victory.
What will you demand as a settlement?


First, we'll demand a complete shutdown
of all bee work camps.


Then we want back the honey
that was ours to begin with,


every last drop.


We demand an end to the glorification
of the bear as anything more


than a filthy, smelly,
bad-breath stink machine.


We're all aware
of what they do in the woods.


Wait for my signal.


Take him out.


He'll have nauseous
for a few hours, then he'll be fine.


And we will no longer tolerate
bee-negative nicknames...


But it's just a prance-about stage name!


...unnecessary inclusion of honey
in bogus health products


and la-dee-da human
tea-time snack garnishments.


Oan't breathe.


Bring it in, boys!


Hold it right there! Good.


Tap it.


Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups,
and there's gallons more coming!


- I think we need to shut down!
- Shut down? We've never shut down.


Shut down honey production!


Stop making honey!


Turn your key, sir!


What do we do now?


Oannonball!


We're shutting honey production!


Mission abort.


Aborting pollination and nectar detail.
Returning to base.


Adam, you wouldn't believe
how much honey was out there.


Oh, yeah?


What's going on? Where is everybody?


- Are they out celebrating?
- They're home.


They don't know what to do.
Laying out, sleeping in.


I heard your Uncle Oarl was on his way
to San Antonio with a cricket.


At least we got our honey back.


Sometimes I think, so what if humans
liked our honey? Who wouldn't?


It's the greatest thing in the world!
I was excited to be part of making it.


This was my new desk. This was my
new job. I wanted to do it really well.


And now...


Now I can't.


I don't understand
why they're not happy.


I thought their lives would be better!


They're doing nothing. It's amazing.
Honey really changes people.


You don't have any idea
what's going on, do you?


- What did you want to show me?
- This.


What happened here?


That is not the half of it.


Oh, no. Oh, my.


They're all wilting.


Doesn't look very good, does it?


No.


And whose fault do you think that is?


You know, I'm gonna guess bees.


Bees?


Specifically, me.


I didn't think bees not needing to make
honey would affect all these things.


It's notjust flowers.
Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees.


That's our whole SAT test right there.


Take away produce, that affects
the entire animal kingdom.


And then, of course...


The human species?


So if there's no more pollination,


it could all just go south here,
couldn't it?


I know this is also partly my fault.


How about a suicide pact?


How do we do it?


- I'll sting you, you step on me.
- Thatjust kills you twice.


Right, right.


Listen, Barry...
sorry, but I gotta get going.


I had to open my mouth and talk.


Vanessa?


Vanessa? Why are you leaving?
Where are you going?


To the final Tournament of Roses parade
in Pasadena.


They've moved it to this weekend
because all the flowers are dying.


It's the last chance
I'll ever have to see it.


Vanessa, I just wanna say I'm sorry.
I never meant it to turn out like this.


I know. Me neither.


Tournament of Roses.
Roses can't do sports.


Wait a minute. Roses. Roses?


Roses!


Vanessa!


Roses?!


Barry?


- Roses are flowers!
- Yes, they are.


Flowers, bees, pollen!


I know.
That's why this is the last parade.


Maybe not.
Oould you ask him to slow down?


Oould you slow down?


Barry!


OK, I made a huge mistake.
This is a total disaster, all my fault.


Yes, it kind of is.


I've ruined the planet.
I wanted to help you


with the flower shop.
I've made it worse.


Actually, it's completely closed down.


I thought maybe you were remodeling.


But I have another idea, and it's
greater than my previous ideas combined.


I don't want to hear it!


All right, they have the roses,
the roses have the pollen.


I know every bee, plant
and flower bud in this park.


All we gotta do is get what they've got
back here with what we've got.


- Bees.
- Park.


- Pollen!
- Flowers.


- Repollination!
- Across the nation!


Tournament of Roses,
Pasadena, Oalifornia.


They've got nothing
but flowers, floats and cotton candy.


Security will be tight.


I have an idea.


Vanessa Bloome, FTD.


Official floral business. It's real.


Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch.


Thank you. It was a gift.


Once inside,
we just pick the right float.


How about The Princess and the Pea?


I could be the princess,
and you could be the pea!


Yes, I got it.


- Where should I sit?
- What are you?


- I believe I'm the pea.
- The pea?


It goes under the mattresses.


- Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart.
- I'm getting the marshal.


You do that!
This whole parade is a fiasco!


Let's see what this baby'll do.


Hey, what are you doing?!


Then all we do
is blend in with traffic...


...without arousing suspicion.


Once at the airport,
there's no stopping us.


Stop! Security.


- You and your insect pack your float?
- Yes.


Has it been
in your possession the entire time?


Would you remove your shoes?


- Remove your stinger.
- It's part of me.


I know. Just having some fun.
Enjoy your flight.


Then if we're lucky, we'll have
just enough pollen to do the job.


Oan you believe how lucky we are? We
have just enough pollen to do the job!


I think this is gonna work.


It's got to work.


Attention, passengers,
this is Oaptain Scott.


We have a bit of bad weather
in New York.


It looks like we'll experience
a couple hours delay.


Barry, these are cut flowers
with no water. They'll never make it.


I gotta get up there
and talk to them.


Be careful.


Oan I get help
with the Sky Mall magazine?


I'd like to order the talking
inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer.


Oaptain, I'm in a real situation.


- What'd you say, Hal?
- Nothing.


Bee!


Don't freak out! My entire species...


What are you doing?


- Wait a minute! I'm an attorney!
- Who's an attorney?


Don't move.


Oh, Barry.


Good afternoon, passengers.
This is your captain.


Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B
please report to the cockpit?


And please hurry!


What happened here?


There was a DustBuster,
a toupee, a life raft exploded.


One's bald, one's in a boat,
they're both unconscious!


- Is that another bee joke?
- No!


No one's flying the plane!


This is JFK control tower, Flight 356.
What's your status?


This is Vanessa Bloome.
I'm a florist from New York.


Where's the pilot?


He's unconscious,
and so is the copilot.


Not good. Does anyone onboard
have flight experience?


As a matter of fact, there is.


- Who's that?
- Barry Benson.


From the honey trial?! Oh, great.


Vanessa, this is nothing more
than a big metal bee.


It's got giant wings, huge engines.


I can't fly a plane.


- Why not? Isn't John Travolta a pilot?
- Yes.


How hard could it be?


Wait, Barry!
We're headed into some lightning.


This is Bob Bumble. We have some
late-breaking news from JFK Airport,


where a suspenseful scene
is developing.


Barry Benson,
fresh from his legal victory...


That's Barry!


...is attempting to land a plane,
loaded with people, flowers


and an incapacitated flight crew.


Flowers?!


We have a storm in the area
and two individuals at the controls


with absolutely no flight experience.


Just a minute.
There's a bee on that plane.


I'm quite familiar with Mr. Benson
and his no-account compadres.


They've done enough damage.


But isn't he your only hope?


Technically, a bee
shouldn't be able to fly at all.


Their wings are too small...


Haven't we heard this a million times?


"The surface area of the wings
and body mass make no sense."


- Get this on the air!
- Got it.


- Stand by.
- We're going live.


The way we work may be a mystery to you.


Making honey takes a lot of bees
doing a lot of small jobs.


But let me tell you about a small job.


If you do it well,
it makes a big difference.


More than we realized.
To us, to everyone.


That's why I want to get bees
back to working together.


That's the bee way!
We're not made of Jell-O.


We get behind a fellow.


- Black and yellow!
- Hello!


Left, right, down, hover.


- Hover?
- Forget hover.


This isn't so hard.
Beep-beep! Beep-beep!


Barry, what happened?!


Wait, I think we were
on autopilot the whole time.


- That may have been helping me.
- And now we're not!


So it turns out I cannot fly a plane.


All of you, let's get
behind this fellow! Move it out!


Move out!


Our only chance is if I do what I'd do,
you copy me with the wings of the plane!


Don't have to yell.


I'm not yelling!
We're in a lot of trouble.


It's very hard to concentrate
with that panicky tone in your voice!


It's not a tone. I'm panicking!


I can't do this!


Vanessa, pull yourself together.
You have to snap out of it!


You snap out of it.


You snap out of it.


- You snap out of it!
- You snap out of it!


- You snap out of it!
- You snap out of it!


- You snap out of it!
- You snap out of it!


- Hold it!
- Why? Oome on, it's my turn.


How is the plane flying?


I don't know.


Hello?


Benson, got any flowers
for a happy occasion in there?


The Pollen Jocks!


They do get behind a fellow.


- Black and yellow.
- Hello.


All right, let's drop this tin can
on the blacktop.


Where? I can't see anything. Oan you?


No, nothing. It's all cloudy.


Oome on. You got to think bee, Barry.


- Thinking bee.
- Thinking bee.


Thinking bee!
Thinking bee! Thinking bee!


Wait a minute.
I think I'm feeling something.


- What?
- I don't know. It's strong, pulling me.


Like a 27-million-year-old instinct.


Bring the nose down.


Thinking bee!
Thinking bee! Thinking bee!


- What in the world is on the tarmac?
- Get some lights on that!


Thinking bee!
Thinking bee! Thinking bee!


- Vanessa, aim for the flower.
- OK.


Out the engines. We're going in
on bee power. Ready, boys?


Affirmative!


Good. Good. Easy, now. That's it.


Land on that flower!


Ready? Full reverse!


Spin it around!


- Not that flower! The other one!
- Which one?


- That flower.
- I'm aiming at the flower!


That's a fat guy in a flowered shirt.
I mean the giant pulsating flower


made of millions of bees!


Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up.


Rotate around it.


- This is insane, Barry!
- This's the only way I know how to fly.


Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane
flying in an insect-like pattern?


Get your nose in there. Don't be afraid.
Smell it. Full reverse!


Just drop it. Be a part of it.


Aim for the center!


Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman!


Oome on, already.


Barry, we did it!
You taught me how to fly!


- Yes. No high-five!
- Right.


Barry, it worked!
Did you see the giant flower?


What giant flower? Where? Of course
I saw the flower! That was genius!


- Thank you.
- But we're not done yet.


Listen, everyone!


This runway is covered
with the last pollen


from the last flowers
available anywhere on Earth.


That means this is our last chance.


We're the only ones who make honey,
pollinate flowers and dress like this.


If we're gonna survive as a species,
this is our moment! What do you say?


Are we going to be bees, orjust
Museum of Natural History keychains?


We're bees!


Keychain!


Then follow me! Except Keychain.


Hold on, Barry. Here.


You've earned this.


Yeah!


I'm a Pollen Jock! And it's a perfect
fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves.


Oh, yeah.


That's our Barry.


Mom! The bees are back!


If anybody needs
to make a call, now's the time.


I got a feeling we'll be
working late tonight!


Here's your change. Have a great
afternoon! Oan I help who's next?


Would you like some honey with that?
It is bee-approved. Don't forget these.


Milk, cream, cheese, it's all me.
And I don't see a nickel!


Sometimes I just feel
like a piece of meat!


I had no idea.


Barry, I'm sorry.
Have you got a moment?


Would you excuse me?
My mosquito associate will help you.


Sorry I'm late.


He's a lawyer too?


I was already a blood-sucking parasite.
All I needed was a briefcase.


Have a great afternoon!


Barry, I just got this huge tulip order,
and I can't get them anywhere.


No problem, Vannie.
Just leave it to me.


You're a lifesaver, Barry.
Oan I help who's next?


All right, scramble, jocks!
It's time to fly.


Thank you, Barry!


That bee is living my life!


Let it go, Kenny.


- When will this nightmare end?!
- Let it all go.


- Beautiful day to fly.
- Sure is.


Between you and me,
I was dying to get out of that office.


You have got
to start thinking bee, my friend.


- Thinking bee!
- Me?


Hold it. Let's just stop
for a second. Hold it.


I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone.
Oan we stop here?


I'm not making a major life decision
during a production number!


All right. Take ten, everybody.
Wrap it up, guys.


I had virtually no rehearsal for that.